Heat Rises... (Fact)

Blogger, Update?

2008-10-03T19:49:00.000-07:00

So I was thinking today that i would like to start blogging again but i don't think many people use Blogger these days. Is this true? ....Or maybe it's just that people don't visit me anymore. I'm sure the lack of posts are to blame. Is there a better site than Blogger? I mean, there was that one i can't remember the name of and then Xanga, Blogger... What's the new one?

-Bren

Australia Update...

2007-11-07T01:53:00.000-08:00

Hello Everyone!

I think it's been about two weeks since my last update but, it doesn't really feel like it. Well, it's weird; sometimes it feels like time has gone by extremely fast and then there are some days when i feel like i've been here for years. Both feelings are good though, it's just weird how it goes back and fourth.

In the last email i said that i was just going into the 'Spiritual Warfare' teaching with Dean Sherman. Well, Dean Sherman wasn't actually there. It was more like Dean Sherman via DVD box set, an old TV and two horrible speakers. Man, his words were so muffled; i really had to pay attention. That week was really good; some really solid teaching. I knew pretty much all of it but again, it was good to hear for the second or third time. Every time i hear a teaching i've heard before i feel like another piece of it sticks to me; or i'll get new revelation on it. Currently, i'm learning about 'Lordship'; how to make God, Lord in my life. I just got out of a class where they were talking about Idolatry (things in life that we have allowed to take the place of God or even become more important than Him to us). I could think of a few, okay...a lot. Then we were talking about how God has given us rights as people and how we have come to abuse them. Meaning, God has given us the right to be intellectual but, to some people, being intellectual has become more important than God. It has taken God's rightful place in their lives. Yeah, so, today was pretty much recognizing the areas in my life that I have given to things other than God and laying them down before Him. So, it's been a good week so far. I'm about halfway through.

When I got settled into my house (Gladstone), i was told that it was right smack in the center of the most dangerous crime area in Perth. Well, wouldn't have known except for the two brothel's that are next door to me. Last week i really got a taste of the area I live in. It was about 12:30 at night and one of the guys i lived with, Jeremy, decided to go for a walk down the ally to call someone on his cell phone. At the same time, three other guys i live with, Jonny, Dean, and Mike went out skateboarding. Jeremy was about halfway through his call, standing at the end of the ally where it met the road when a car of about four aboriginal kids drove up slowly starring at him. The car stopped and all four kids jumped out and run up to Jeremy holding a knife telling him to hand over his money. Just as this was happening, Jonny, Dean, and Mike were skateboarding down the same ally. The four kids saw them coming and immediately backed off and jumped back into the car. Jonny, Dean, and Mike were almost to Jeremy when the kids in the car threw it in reverse and tried to run them all over. The car barely missed them as they dove behind a rubbish bin. The four guys, including Jeremy, somewhat shaken up from the 'attempted' mugging slowly looked around the corner of the bin at the approximate one hundred meter run to the security fence that surrounded our house. Thinking it was safe, the four guys began running toward the gate. They were almost there, only a few more meters when car lights in the distant dark ally ahead. The car tires screeched as it bolted out from ahead of them. Dean jumped out of the way and ran down the ally away from the house while the others, Jonny, Jeremy, and Mike dove to the ground avoiding the car once again and quickly jumped to their feet running to the gate. The car made it to the end of the ally and turned around heading towards the house. It got there just as the three guys did. The aboriginal kids jumped out of the car, knife in hand; trying to get Jeremy. Having trouble with the gate's combination lock, Jonny and Mike jumped over the fence, opened the gate door and grabbed Jeremy just before the Four kids did. One of the kids jumped up onto the roof of the car and when he saw that there were about fifteen guys living there, they all decided to take off.

So, yeah. It was a crazy night. Jeremy was pretty shaken up after that. We all were. I was on the patio just after they left so i didn't see them. We took about half an hour just to pray protection for the area surrounding our house and the girls house which is just a few houses down the ally from ours. Also, we prayed for the aboriginal kids; that they would make it home safe and we just took time to bless them.

Every Tuesday night i have 'small groups' which is just a time to hang out and talk about the weekly teachings. Well, last night my small group leader took the day off because his girlfriend from Colorado was in town and he wanted to spend time with her. I'm sure if i had a girlfriend that lived on the other side of earth come to visit me i'd take the day off too, ha ha. We ended up combining four different small groups and we all went to the beach for a barbecue. Oh man. the beach is so beautiful at sunset. We spent like forty five minutes and went swimming in the ocean. The waves were so nice. Just after sunset, we played rugby, well i didn't because i was still feeling stick from having tonsillitis the week before. My throat was in so much pain for a few days.. but, it's pretty good now.

So, you know how i told you i would let you know what my options are for out reach as soon as i find out what they are? Well, i know!

Okay i have to pick one from five teems. I'll give you the price for each one. I'll list them for you here:

Outreach 1
Jakarta Indonesia for two months
Tunisia for one week
Egypt for 2 and a half weeks.
$5,173 AUD

Outreach 2
Jakarta, INdonesia for 3 months
$2,900 AUD

OUtreach 3
Jakarta, Indonesia for two months
Ethiopia for two and a half weeks
Eritrea or Djibouti for one week
$5,500 AUD

Outreach 4
Jakarta, Indonesia for two months
Egypt for two and a half weeks
Libya for one week
$5,239

Outreach 5
Jakarta, Indonesia for two months
Central African Republic for three and a half weeks
$5,500 AUD

I have to make a decision by November 8th, which is tomorrow. So, by the time you read this email mail i probably will have made my decision. I'm really praying because i want to go on the Outreach God wants me to go on. I want to go on outreach #1 but, that's just me. I don't want it to be my decision. I want it to be God's. Also, i currently don't have any out reach money. I'm really trusting God to provide for me on this one. Because i may have to raise up to $5,500 AUD by December 9th. If i don't have enough money by then i won't be able to go on outreach and i won't be able to graduate which would suck but, i'm not worried about it because God provides.

I just want to say that i can't do any of this without your help and it's not just me helping the people and children of Jakarta but it's all of you. So when you support me; you're really supporting the people and children of Jakarta, Indonesia, Tunisia, Egypt, Ethiopia, Eritrea, Djibouti, Libya, and Central African Republic... Wherever it may be. People's lives will be forever changed...because of you.

Any donations can be sent via money order or certified cheque made out to Youth With A Mission - Perth. It can be mailed to me at:

Brendan Serez

P.O. Box 8501, Perth Business Centre, Western Australia 6849
Perth, Australia

....Or, you can just click on the 'Donation' button below..

Thank you guys so much for all your support over the years! You guys are awesome! Thank you all for continued prayer support while I'm over here.
God Bless You!
Love,

-Brendan Serez

P.S. It is really great to receive real "mail" while I'm over here. (You can use the above address)

Australia Update...

2007-10-29T02:41:00.001-07:00

Hello Everybody!

If you didn't already know...I have just recently joined Youth With A Mission In Perth, Australia. I've been attending the Discipleship Training School. It's really awesome! I've been here since the 5th of October and started the school on the 7th. When i first got here i didn't really know what to expect because to be honest; i didn't know very much about YWAM. All i knew for sure was that they focus on missions. I landed in Perth thinking "wow, that was fast!" when in reality it wasn't. It took about 38 hours from Toronto to Perth. The reason it felt fast is because i was very nervous about coming to YWAM and Australia. I've never been away from family and friends for this long. It really came down to trusting God and putting Him first in my life and realizing that i am never alone because God is always there. Anyway...Things are going pretty good for me at the moment. I live off base and share an apartment with 6 guys. it's pretty nice; very modern looking. Every morning i wake up at 6 to exercise. You're probably think..."Bren, getting up at 6? no way!" Well, it's true. It was hard to get used to at first but, it's in my routine now. I've been making a lot of really great friends and connecting with some pretty sweet leaders.

I have three months of lecture and three months that i spend on outreach in two countries. For the lecture phase, we get a different speaker that comes in every week to teach on a different topic. Week one's topic was "The Character of God". Pretty basic stuff that i already know but it was good to hear it again. That's pretty much how it's been with the teachings... It's all stuff i know already (thank you TACF!) ha ha. I've learned to ask God for more revelation on the teachings. I'm slowly getting stuff out of it all. Though, i have no doubt that I'm about to get a lot from it, No doubt. Week two was on "Repentance and Forgiveness". Same story.... since TACF is so focused on this area... I was pretty "up to date" on all these things but, there's always something i have to ask forgiveness and repent of. So, that week went pretty good. Week three was on "Intercession and Worship". That week was pretty good, again, it was all stuff i knew already but, i tried to make the most of it. One of the things God has been telling me is that "Having knowledge in a certain area is nothing if you don't do anything with it". I thought i was an expert on all this stuff but, i guess not. It was good to hear that. Tomorrow I'm starting Spiritual Warfare with Dean Sherman. So, that should be fun. Also, i have a lot more work than i thought i would have. I have to write three book reports, keep and hand in a weekly journal, several class presentations, research projects, and i think there's a bunch of other things i have to do. I mean, it's not that much work. It's just more than i thought i wold have,

I really have been having a lot of fun. Like, sometimes the school takes us on small day trips to cool, must see places. At least that's what they say. For example, 2 weeks ago the whole school went to a National park called Serpentine Falls about an hour and a half from Perth. It was beautiful with rock canyons, wild flowers, and waterfalls. Me and two other guys thought it would be a good idea to climb the sixty five foot cliff and jump off of it. We reached the top and looked down. It looked so much higher from the top as it most often does. The first two guys jumped off it and landed as well as they could have. It was my turn to jump and i didn't really feel like "just jumping". I decided to do a front flip. It was so much fun.........until i hit the water and bruised five ribs and chipped two teeth. OUCH! I over rotated and my chest slammed against the water as my teeth also slammed together. Good thing my tongue wasn't in the way. ha ha. I had to file my teeth down when i got home. All in all... i still think it was a good idea. Apparently YWAM is going to take the whole school on a weekend camping trip.

If you guys are wondering where i'll be going on outreach....I can tell you know because i just found out myself. Well, I'm going to two places but i only know one of them. I'll be going to Jakarta, Indonesia to Start the Megacities program which is a project that targets a city of over one million people for a period of 12 months acting as a laser catalyst for city wide transformation. We do this through strong partnership between the local Body of Christ and international, multi-disciplined teams. Together, we work at a grassroots level to strengthen existing ministries and pioneer new works. We go out into a city and do evangelism in the streets and provide food for the many children running around the city that don't have families or homes. We're going to just really love on the people of Jakarta and Minister to them the best we can. I don't know what other country I'm going to yet but it could be Western Africa, China, Japan, or Kazakhstan. I think there are others but, I'm not sure what they are at this point. I'll let you know as soon as i do.

Let me tell you a bit of my schedule for the next five months....
I'm in Australia for three months in the school during the lecture phase then, I'm flying to Jakarta and staying there for one month then, I'll be flying to that 'other' country and staying there for one month them, I'm flying back to Jakarta and staying there for another month then I'm flying back to Australia... PHEW! Crazy eh?!

I'll be trying to update this every week or as often as i can.

The outreach phase will cost about $4,000... and i currently don't have any of it. So, I'm really trusting God that He will provide. As you can see... I need a lot of help! If any of you would like to support me so i can help the people and children of Jakarta, I will be extremely thankful and so will they I'm sure. Thank you guys so much for all your support over the years! You guys are awesome!

I have come to realize that my previous post was extremely lame.. Sorry about that.. I'll try to post something more interesting next time..

2007-09-06T18:12:00.001-07:00

37 people are killed every year due to Piñata related "accidents"...

2007-08-21T22:54:00.000-07:00

For years i've been trying to prove that Piñata's are dangerous and life threatening... Nobody would ever listin to me, UNTIL NOW! I have proof!

Quarantine...well, not really...at all....

2007-08-17T19:59:00.000-07:00

Lately i've been feeling dry. Okay, we're talking mega crazy dry.. I feel so dry that somtimes it feels like i'm stranded in a desert somewhere thinking i'm seeing a mirage. Metaphorically speaking of course. "Is that a mystical oasis thriving with life Mr. talking coconut man"? ha ha, seriously... "No, i'm sorry Bren, that's just more sand". I hope by now we're understanding the intensity of the dryness i'm feeling by now. I've been living in the middle of nowhere for just over a year and i don't think i can take it anymore. I'm losing my mind...slowly... Okay, so... maybe i'm overreacting slightly but, my main feeling is, i need to get out of here. I think the thing i miss most is spending time with friends on a regular basis. It's hard when you lose touch with friends. You know how usually when people lose touch with friends but then make new friends, well, i haven't made any new friends because there's nobody to hang out with in the middle of nowhere. ha ha. Don't get me wrong, i do have friends, i just don't get to see them as much as i'd like. I miss not being able to just call somone up and say "hey man, let's go catch a movie or go for a ride". I can't do this anymore because my closest friend is about two hours away. I guess i've just been feeling down lately for these reasons. well, that and i'm slowly realizing that i lead an extremelt boring life. Here's my daily schedule: Get up, eat, work, eat, work, work on my computer, sleep, and repeat. This lifestyle makes me all the more excited for Australia!!! I can't wait! I really need this, if i wasn't going i think i would actually go crazy. You know when you're so tired of everything being the same? Well, i do....I need something new...NOW!

47 Days to go!!!

war greed selfishness anger power Silence.

2007-08-12T18:09:00.002-07:00

I'm going to Australia!!!!

2007-07-02T13:54:00.000-07:00

Hello Everybody who reads my Blog...

I just recieved my confirmation email for YWAM Perth, Australia!!

Just thought i would let you all know....... I'll be leaving roughly the 4th of October, and i'll be gone for 6 months....
I'm still trying to raise money to go because i don't exactly have all the funds necessary.... If anyone would like to sponsor me or just make a donation.. Please click on the button below...... Thanks!

To learn more about Youth With A Mission, see this link: http://www.ywamperth.org.au/life/?about

MY WATCH!!!!!

2007-06-11T14:09:00.000-07:00

I think it was last week when i decided to go tubing with my sisters, Jordan and Caroline..
I guess about half way down the river.......My watch came off.

I went all the way up the river with my dad and Breanne, searching..... But, i coudn't find it anywhere...
My beautiful Swiss watch that my Grandma gave me is gone...

It really sucks........now, i have to get another one....money money money!!!! I'm estimating $300 ish....

A WHOLE FREAKING YEAR!!!

2007-06-01T14:41:00.000-07:00

SO, today is the 1st of June which makes it exactly ONE YEAR that i've lived in Hanover...

I just looked at the calendar the other day......it was weird..... It doesn't really seem like i've been here for that long..
where did the time go?!?! ha ha.....

That's all.......just thought i'd let you know...

Peace

MMM.....Chips...

2007-05-26T18:20:00.000-07:00

Today kinda sucked because for some reason i was getting frustrated with EVERYTHING.....ha ha....and i mean everything.. Family, cats, the tractor, jobs i had to do, eBay, My paypal account for holding my money, My PC account for charging me money, FedEx for not delivering my packages.........AAAAAA!!! So much crap....Like, it's all normal day-to-day stuff. BUt, i wasn't handling it very well. I had a lot of things to deal with at the moment. I couldn’t take it anymore! ha!

So i decided to go Kayaking... I grabbed the cell phone, put in a ziplock bag and threw in into my pocket. I grabbed some food and a drink in case i got hungry or stranded somewhere..... I walked out to get the kayak...-picked it up, threw the food in and looked over at the bottom of it. THE FREAKING STUPID RETARTED DOGS CHEWED A HOLE IN IT!!! I was so pissed. Duck tape!!! So, after searching 20 min. for the stupid tape....I FOUND IT! Taped up the hole and headed off to the river.

After about 30 minutes of kayaking and avoiding fallen branches.......i was getting hungry-pulling out my beef Mr. Noodles i realized how much i hated them. but hay! it's food! (kinda) After finishing up the noodles; i was kinda still hungry. I paddled around a bend in the river and saw something shiny.... IT WAS A BAG OF HUMPTY DUMPTY DILL PICKLE CHIPS....Unopened! they were just floating there! I picked them up out of the water, opened them, and ate one.........they were actually fresh! So, i like ate half the bag.........It was a good day...

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

2007-05-10T18:09:00.000-07:00

My path is crooked
My path is straight

The lights are dim
The lights are bright

All is gone
All is here

All is good
No more fear.

Sometimes i get cought up in expectations...

2007-05-02T16:31:00.000-07:00

[BE]........That's all....

Abercrombie & Fitch is SO GAY!!!

2007-04-25T20:04:00.001-07:00

Please watch the whole thing.....!!!! PLEASE!!!

Have you heard the new United album!!!????

2007-04-11T16:44:00.000-07:00

The tide is turning this is redemption time. In the midst of the world lost forever you are all we have now. the last returning, salvation is all around..........

-United Live

ha ha

2007-02-14T14:08:00.000-08:00

My Car is barried in the snow. ha ha

I'll post a "real" blog later.

People should blog more

2007-01-09T23:06:00.000-08:00

I don't really feel like anyone reads this anymore. Everyone has converted to myspace. I want to keep Blogging, but who reads it? I know so many people that don't even blog anymore thanks to myspace.

Come on people! Blog!

I almost died today!!!!!!!

2006-12-14T21:04:00.000-08:00

ha ha, okay. i have a funny/serious/i could have died story for you. So, today, i almost died. I kid you not. i am extremely thankful to be writing this right now.

Today, Jordan, my dad, and I were working on building a fence around our house. (as you can see in the pictures) I was drilling a hole for one of the fence posts when i raised the drill on the back of the tractor to scoop out some dirt from the hole. (The drill bit was still spinning) So, i'm scooping when all of a sudden my coat hood gets cought in the dit. It immediately twisted my coat around my neck while starting to spin me around. My hands were around my neck trying to pull the hood away so i could breath, but it was too tight.

Finally my dad sees what's going on and trys to pull me from the bit. (still spinning) And jordan quickly shut of the tractor.
h aha, my head felt like it was going to explode. My neck is still killing me.

well, i'm glad to be alive.

peace out...

...Sending me flying through the air...

2006-12-12T18:33:00.000-08:00

Okay, so today my brother told me that Ebaumsworld will pay you $500 if you send them a video and it gets put on the site. So, I had an awesome idea for a video. A few months ago when James and kev were staying at my place for like 3 weeks; some random guy at the campground came up to us and gave us a free car. It was pretty sweet because it actually worked. My idea was to have Jordan driving while I stood on the hood in some kind of surfer stance. We would get up to speed and Jordan would slam into some kind of heavy object thus sending my flying through the air into the river or pond. What do you think? I think it’s an awesome idea. It would definitely get me 500 bucks.

Jordan suggested that I do a series of back flips off the silo. Sure, I’d get the 500 bucks, but I would be dead. Maybe I could try and roll the car in the field. I would have to tape a camera to the back dashboard. …and Andy Choly would have to be in the passenger seat and James in the back. If you ever see them, ask them about our field driving experiences. Ha ha.

Peace out...

Success!

2006-11-28T19:08:00.000-08:00

Well, my Birthday was a complete success. I turned 18 exactly as planned. he he
Sorry about the "lack of words" in my previous posts. I'll try to write something good soon.

God Bless

6 Days!

2006-11-20T22:37:00.000-08:00

My Birthday is in 6 days! I can't believe it. Time goes by so fast!

It's as if it were written for me...

2006-11-16T23:21:00.000-08:00

If I were to write a song about me; it would sound like this. It's amazing how accurate it is. I cry everytime i listen to it...

catch your breath
hit the wall
scream out loud
as you start to crawl
back in your cage
the only place
where they will
leave you alone
cause the weak will seek the weaker till they've broken them
could you get it back again
would it be the same
fulfillment to their lack of strength at your expense
left you with no defense
they tore it down

and I have felt the same
as you I've felt the same
as you I've felt the same

locked inside
the only place
where you feel sheltered
where you feel safe
you lost yourself
in your search to find
something else to hide behind
cause the fearful always preyed upon your confidence
didn't they see the consequence
they pushed you around
the arrogant build kingdoms made of the different ones
breaking them till they've become
just another crown

and I have felt the same
as you I've felt the same
as you I've felt the same
as you I've felt the same

refuse to feel
anything at all
refuse to slip
refuse to fall
can't be weak
can't stand still
watch your back
cause no one will

you don't know why they had to go this far
traded your worth for these scars
for your only company
and don't believe the lies that they have told to you
not one word was true
you're alright
you're alright
you're alright

and I have felt the same
as you I've felt the same
as you I've felt the same
as you I've felt the same

I am Here...

2006-11-15T17:33:00.000-08:00

You overtake me.... You build and break me....

All the many names of Brendan Serez

2006-11-12T22:00:00.000-08:00

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current street name)

Chelsey Mulock

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fav icecream flavor,favorite cookie)

Rainbow Sherbert Peanut Butter

3. YOUR "FLY Guy/Girl" NAME: (first initial of first name, first two letters of your last name)

BSe

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal)

Green Tiger

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)

Daniel North York

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)

BreSe

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink put "The")

Blue Dr. Pepper

8. NASCAR NAME: (the first name of your grandfathers on both sides)

Jack David

9. STRIPPER NAME: (the name of your favorite perfume or cologne, favorite candy)

Lacoste Hot Tomales

10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother & father's middle names)

Eric Ellizibeth

Where i have been, and where i would like to go..

2006-11-08T13:09:00.000-08:00

These are all the countries i want to travel to in the future.

And this is where i have been, haha

Hmm... Why? Is it me?

2006-10-31T17:44:00.000-08:00

Your Unique Costume is Mega Demon

Be the afterlife of the party!

What Totally Unique Halloween Costume Should You Wear?

War of Kingdoms

2006-10-18T17:14:00.000-07:00

Do you know what this is? It’s a war. A slow moving symphony of violent lights aligned in beat to one roar.

When your life reaches it peak and there’s nothing left to accomplish… what then? Do you give up? Do you set out for a quest to find something you can call mastered?

Is there more to learn? Your mind is undecided. Where do you stand? You don’t have much time to think about it. You’ve seen the facts, and you’ve seen them being played out in your life.
When that spectacular roar breaks, the sky clears, mountains shake, and weary soldiers fall to their knees. What will you do when you find yourself in the middle of the War of Kingdoms?

more to come...

U2 is sooo good!

2006-10-06T09:35:00.000-07:00

I love this song...

U2: Where the streets have no name:

I want to run
I want to hide
I want to tear down the walls
That hold me inside
I want to reach out
And touch the flame
Where the streets have no name

I want to feel sunlight on my face
I see the dust cloud disappear Without a trace
I want to take shelter from the poison rain
Where the streets have no name

Where the streets have no name
Where the streets have no name
We're still building Then burning down love
Burning down love
And when I go there
I go there with you
It's all I can do

The city's aflood
And our love turns to rust
We're beaten and blown by the wind
Trampled in dust
I'll show you a place
High on a desert plain
Where the streets have no name
Where the streets have no name

Where the streets have no name
We're still building
Then burning down love
Burning down love
And when I go there
I go there with you
It's all I can do
Our love turns to rust
We're beaten and blown by the wind
Blown by the wind
Oh, and I see love
See our love turn to rust
We're beaten and blown by the wind
Blown by the wind
Oh, when I go there
I go there with you
It's all I can do

2006-09-27T14:49:00.000-07:00

Jeremiah 15:20
I will make you a wall to this people, a fortified wall of bronze; they will fight against you but will not overcome you, for I am with you to rescue and save you," declares the LORD.

via The Bible

Youth Camp 06'

2006-09-07T21:00:00.001-07:00

Hey guys,

Well, its been a while, i know. I'm sorry. Lately, I haven't really known what to write,. I would sit down to write something, and nothing would come out. Lately i've just had so take a step back and look at things differently. Take time to just listen and feel life, That may sound weird, but i don't know any other way to describe it.

Last week, I was at TACF's youth camp. Wow! it was so good. Like honestly, words cannot describe it. Last year at youth camp; It took the youth until the last night to really enter into the Holy Spirit and what God was doing. Last year was absolutely
insane! I'm not kidding. Kids were so drunk in the spirit, and so heavy in the Glory of the Lord that it took at least five other guys to carry them back to their cabins. Well, this year was about 3 times more insane as last year. Maybe now you have a bit of an idea how INSANE it was. OKay, The third night at this years camp was just a bit more insane than the last night of last years camp. There were about 90 kids this year, and every one of their lives were radically changed through Jesus Christ; Including mine. I was able to forgive countless persons whom i have held on to for many years. It was an INCREDIBLE week!

P.S. I have the most AMAZING friends ever! I could never ask for better friends, because i already have the best. You guys are always there for me.

...you know who you are.

The End... Is It?

2006-08-14T18:08:00.000-07:00

Get away from me! Don’t you dare try to talk me out of it; I’ve made up my mind. This is it. All that I have, all that I am. What?! What is it? Nothing? Everything I’ve known; has it been a lie? What am i doing? What is this life for? Get away from! I don't want to see you ever again. You disgust me. You bring death to everything your shadow touches. I’m tired of you. Get away from me, you disgusting pig. You think you can talk me out of it? I don't think you can. Here I go, this is it. what are you going to do about it? Nothing! You can't mess with me and my emotions anymore. Your time is up. I'm walking the line. It’s just a matter of time. You’ll see. Do you know what is going to happen next? You will not survive this. Yes I will! You can't take that away from me. This is my time. You have walked in death your entire life. Yeah, you thought I wasn't there, but I was. Eating away at your supports until you couldn't even stand, and I laughed as you came crashing to the ground. What makes this next step any different? Let me tell you something, you have no right to do this, this is not your. You have been stepping out of what you know. your bound on me has been broken. There is nothing you can do about it. I am protected. Try and touch me, you can't. I am out of you. This is just another notch on your life. what makes you think this is the last time we'll do this? Because its war. Here we go! I'm running! Getting faster. You can't run from me. You're right. I can't, I don't have to run from you. The great worrier will defeat you. Your days are numbered. It’s only a matter of time. Are you ready for what happens next? This will never happen! You don't know what you are talking about! You speak of things you don't know! You're wrong, because I know this for sure. The time is soon; you will bow down in a great temple at the feet of the Great Warrior. You know what is going to happen. It will happen. Take a breath; get ready.

Lets finish this…

Stuck in a Rut

2006-07-28T14:43:00.000-07:00

Trying out a new direction in living life. All else has failed…

Rock Solid

2006-06-28T23:09:00.000-07:00

And I also say to you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build My church, and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it. Matthew 16:18
Is Peter the rock on which Jesus would build His church? Hardly. Jesus does not build on weak and fallible human beings. He builds in cooperation with them but not on them. So what, then, is the rock? The rock is the confession by Peter, through revelation from God, that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of the living God. It was upon this truth, this principle that God planned to build His Church, the body of Christ, as well as every individual church. The Messiah is the anointed king. When Jesus is allowed to be king and decision-maker in the Church, the gates of hell cannot prevail against it. Yet too often people in the church, rather than God, are the sole decision-makers, doing what they want and believe is right. Therefore, the Church is not strong. Pride, reluctance to obey, hunger for power and unholy ambitions have opened the doors to worldly influence in the Church and made it easy for Satan to kill, steal and destroy.(John 10:10)
Israel’s long history offers countless examples of the misery and captivity that backsliding and revolt against God lead to. Jesus is anointed to rule and reign. His kingdom is the only good one. When He is allowed to build His Church as He has envisioned, the Church becomes strong, powerful, free and victorious. Then it matters little what hell attempts because the Church will still be victorious. The key to victory lies in our dependence on Jesus and the acknowledgement of Him as ruler. He alone is the king; we are not. He decides; we do not. His Church ought to be full of Him. His revelation is the rock. His dreams and visions are the foundation. His revealed word and will are the only guarantees for victory.

I'm Alive!!!!!!! Whoo Hoo!!!!!

2006-06-13T14:30:00.000-07:00

Hello people out there who read this blog.
I have to make this quick because of the stupid hot spot at the mall. i only have 15 minutes befor i have to register again. I'm grateful for free hot spots. ...and im trying to avoid an angry woman behind me that keeps on swearing at her employees. I think she needs Jesus, haha who doesn't? Anyway, the real point to this Blog is to inform you all that i am alive. im living at the campground my parents have recently purchased. its going alright, i mean, i really miss all of my friends, and i can;t wait to see you all again. Also, i have no internet at my house (hense the hot spot). I am in great need of a hug. Well, that all for now. I'm actually in Newmarket right now with my dad because he is finishing up some last minute jobs in the City. I miss you guys alot. I know that im only 2 hours away, but when i don't have a drivers license, its alot further.

Ciao, Bren

Confrontation is a good thing at times...

2006-06-07T20:19:00.000-07:00

Confrontation is an important word. It is the method Jesus used 2000yrs ago in His ministry. When Jesus came into the region of Caesarea Philippi, He asked His disciples, saying, "Who do men say that I, the Son of Man, am?" So they said, "Some say John the Baptist, some Elijah, and others Jeremiah or one of the prophets." He said to them, "But who do you say that I am?"

The disciples evaded the question. Jesus confronted the truth.

What happens when you confront the matter instead of beating about the bush?
Simon Peter answered and said, "You are the Christ, the Son of the living God." Peter could deny no more. He finally said what he felt. The truth surfaces.

Confrontation is necessary. There will be tough times some times, but we must still choose to speak out.

P.S. This is my first post ever from a Mac. For those who have been following my computer drama; i finally have my own MacBook Pro!

New... Gardens...

2006-05-21T22:22:00.000-07:00

Just sitting here in my own little world that no one understands and never will understand; thinking about what my life meant to me when I needed it most and how it is currently meaning to me, and what I plan on doing with it.

Sometimes all I can do with everything is just to take a step back and look at it from another angle. In life, you will go through all kinds of bumps and curves. But, at the end of every challenge or hard time; stands a loving father with his hands wide open for you to run into.

Running through an open garden that at one time was bursting with flourishment. Tattered and wilted leaves break off and fall to the ground from the breeze of running past them at great speeds. I’m running through a path with wilted gardens on both sides. As I'm running, I lift my hands to heaven and a fresh new breeze falls down consuming every part of me. The wind hit’s the ground with a loud mighty bang and spreads off into all directions throughout the decaying garden. The garden that was once dead and wilted, is now a garden the is erupting with flourishment and life.

Will you let Him transform your garden?

Tear down the rags that hold you bound, and show the real You!

2006-05-09T22:22:00.000-07:00

Why can’t you see the real me through these tattered rags I wear? Unknowingly you complain to yourself because you cannot see. Why do you complain because of something you know nothing about; you don’t even know what I look like inside. You know nothing about me. If you could see, would you like it?

I so badly want to engulf myself in flame, and burn away the walls I have put up in the past to protect myself from what I know nothing about. It looked dangerous, and I protected myself. Well, I thought I did. The very walls I put up with thought of protection; have been eating away at my soul.

I had a dream the other day. I saw myself walking along a brick road and I was crying because I was so tired of the was things were and the way things were in my life. It relates to the paragraph above. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore, and started to scream. I turned my face to the sky and screamed with every breath within me. All of a sudden, my whole body was engulfed in flame as pieces of what looked to be ashes falling from my skin. The flame went out, and there was lots of smoke. The walls I had put up to protect myself, and the same ones that held me bound, were burned into ash scattered all over the floor.

It was really cool. I’m very excited for what God is doing in my life. He’s taking me places I never thought I would go, and stretching me further than I ever thought I could.

He's looking through you...

2006-05-07T11:55:00.000-07:00

Shout up a cry into the wind, stars, and space. Knowing, knowing that the lost have come home, and the forgotten have been seen and welcomed into the kingdom. Clutch the death in your hand that once held you bound and tied in abundant terror; it no longer has you bound. You can now loosen your grip for it no longer has you trapped inside the constant knowing that there is no escape from you misery. Take that death in your hand and throw down before your feet. Gaze at it for a while think of all the times it cost you in life. With all this rushing through your head, take a leap into the air and come storming down upon death, crushing it into millions of pieces.

Freedom comes with a price. Fortunately, this price did not have to be paid by me. The greatest price of all humanity was paid in full by one man. Everything fell upon his shoulders. Everything, past, present, and future.

Sometimes when I am all alone in the darkness of my sin; slurping up what has already been excreated from thousands of sins before me. I always find a sense of fortification within the presence of the Father that I cannot, by no way, find anywhere else. When I look into the vast extravagance of space, I always see the father looking straight through me into my heart. On His face sits a smile that can be seen across space and galaxies within every hour of every day. It’s a smile that cannot be ignored or unnoticed. it’s a smile that says: “you are my child, and no matter what you go through in your life, know, that this smile on my face never changes”.

Gift Card!!!!?????

2006-05-03T07:59:00.000-07:00

Does anyone need a Staples Buisness Depot gift card?!?!?!?!?! I have one i need to sell. It has a value of $1,250.00 Please let me know!!!!

Decisions...

2006-04-30T21:42:00.000-07:00

MacBook Pro, or A Cannondale F4000 sl Hmm...?

You see, I need the Mac for video editing and School, and I need the Cannondale for Competition racing in the fall. Arg. Both are very expensive, and I can definitely only get one of them. Still thinking and praying about it.

Racing Trucks!!!

2006-04-28T10:08:00.000-07:00

Hey everybody. The other day I had a thought. “I know, Amazing!” I was walking to work the other day and I saw this beautiful Dodge truck in a nearby Price Chopper Parking lot. It was bright yellow with black racing stripes running from front to back. It had a big spoiler on the back and huge shiny chrome rims. I thought to myself: “why the heck do people try to make a truck into a sports car”? I mean, why don’t they just buy a sports car. Its not like they can’t afford it because that dodge probably cost them like 50g’s. I don’t know, I think its stupid.

I love Salvador Dali!!!

2006-04-25T21:34:00.000-07:00

Hello,

So, a while ago, when I actually had an art class I studied the work of Salvador Dali. I absolutely lave his work, I mean, look at these paintings. they are so beautiful. The thing that I love about them is, they're different. you know? They're not like any normal paintings out there. They're so abstract. I love them like that. I do a lot of drawings in my sketch book that are very unusual. I don’t like things normal.

Crappy Night!!!

2006-04-21T19:19:00.000-07:00

Hello to the few people that read my blog. I am so tired right now, partly because I am still recovering from fresh wind and being sick is not helping very much. Also, since I have been sick, I have had this very painful muscle cramp in my inner arm pit. At that time I just thought it must be from just dancing. But, as the days past, the pain started to move or spread from my arm pit to the rest of my arm. It felt like there was a very tight tendon that was about to snap. Lots and lots of pain. It got so bad that I couldn’t even straighten out my arm. I could only bend it half way.

On Wednesday night, I had to go to work. Oh, my goodness . I can not tell you how horrible that shift was. First off, I couldn't straighten out my arm, so that sucked because most things at my job require me to fully extend my arm. I didn’t tell anyone at work that I was in pain. Most of the guys at work tend to be rowdy from time to time. Well, most of the time they are. The pain was so bad that I couldn’t even touch the skin on my arm because it would hurt so much. That was Wednesday night. I had to work again on Thursday night and that was pretty much the same as Wednesday night. I was like: “God!, what the heck is this? I am not going to put up with this, Satan!!!! Take your freaking crap back!!! I don’t want it!”. Things seemed to get better after that.

Thursday night, I got off work at about 10:30p.m. when my mom picked me up and took me to the clinic for to see what was going on. We arrived at the clinic at 10:45 ish and waited to be seen until 12:10. The Doctor didn’t know what was causing it. He thought it could be a blood clot. So, he recommended that we go to the Hospital. His name was Doctor Wong, I thought that was kind of funny. We arrived at the hospital at about 12:45 and went straight to emergency. When we walked in we saw some drunk teenager swearing at the EMS guys. It was funny. We, my mom and I, waited until 2:30 a.m. to be taken in to be looked at. A nurse came into the waiting area and took us to a little room where we waited for about 30 minutes. Oh, my goodness, I was so tired. FINAlly!!! We come in contact with a real doctor after like years of waiting!!!

Then came the worst part. He made me strip naked and put on one of those patient dress things. It was horrible. Especially because it was my fist time going to the hospital in like 14 years or so. He sat me in one of those beds and examined me. He started feeling around for certain glands. Aparently there are alot of glands in the crotch area. Who knew!!! So, it turns out that I have lymphangitis. its an acute inflammation of the lymph channels caused by infection and producing conspicuous red streaks under the skin as well as fever. So, yeah. I got some pills and got to go home at like four in the morning. It was great!! Going home I mean.

That was one of the worst nights I have ever had. On top of all that! I just broke a tooth about an hour ago and I don’t have the money to pay for it. Dah!!!

God is good! No matter what is going on in my life, me is always high and in control. Always knowing what he is doing. He is worthy of all my trust, and everything I am. I give it to you
!!!!

Freshwind!

2006-04-18T21:26:00.000-07:00

Wow, Freshwind was amazing. Like, for those who were unable to make it, you have no idea how freaking awesome it was. I was able to be on the ministry team this year which was amazing. God did so many things in me this past weekend that i don't even think i could list them all. He gave me confidence in myself, something that i would never have thought i could have. A Prayer: Suddenly I feel you leading me, suddenly I feel you holding me, I feel the shadow of your wings covering me, protecting me. Holy Spirit, continue to sweep me away. On Friday night, I exchanged saliva with one of my friends who was sick by drinking from his water bottle. So, I got sick that night and I am still sick today. It really sucks because on top of being sick, I have no energy because Freshwind. It was so bad though. i was like vomitting my gut out, haha, its like, "oops, there goes a lung".

This year was amazing for me because my very own BROTHER Jordan had the opportunity of playing guitar and singing! Dude, I am so freaking proud of you bro. Seriously, he did a freaking amazing job.

A Prayer:

Father God, I choose right now not to settle with this sickness that is on me, I choose to give it back to its rightly owner. Satan, I give this sickness back to you. I don’t want it anymore.

No Sound is without Meaning

2006-04-11T22:07:00.000-07:00

1 Cor 14 10 says, "There are many sounds but none with out meaning." What an awesome thought, every sound has a meaning. I apply this to nature and awe just thinking of different meanings some sounds could have. You hear the trees blowing. A single leaf moving with the wind against another is almost silent, but what you hear is a symphony. And yet is one leaf insignificant part in that symphony with out meaning, does it gain meaning joined with the collective whole. I don't know but I marvel at the wondrous creation our God has made, even in that insignificant leaf.

The Victory of Defeat

2006-04-06T20:20:00.000-07:00

Sometimes we go through trial and hard times when God doesn't seem so close, or it may even seem like he isn't even there. We get discouraged and doubtful when we don't see tyhe kind of change we want to see. In times like these when God says enough, and when you are on your last leg and all of a sudden, there He is lifting you up, the victory is so great and brings glory to God. Lord I thank you for doing that in my life. I thank you for lifting me up. It is hard to do but I thank you for my trails as well because I know I learn from them. Strengthen me Lord to stand. I will strengthen you even when you don't see. Praise You Lord!!!

Funeral of Reality

2006-04-03T09:45:00.000-07:00

We don’t know the difference between what is real and what is substitute. For us to distinguish between what is real and what is a substitute is subject to experience, reason, and authority. If we have a choice to make it comes down to these three. It seems to me many times in our life we assume that something is either a reality or substitute with out first having experience, or with out having reasoned our choice, or with out listening to authority. This can be a fatal error, especially where eternity is concerned. Many people reason there is no God or He doesn't care based on that they what to see. Some people have a bad experience and assume church is just a substitute for something they them selves are still looking for. In both these cases people never listen to authority. People try to tell me stuff about the bible all the time and they themselves haven't even read what they are talking about. Take a chance reading the authoritative word of God, then you will have reason to believe and then you will have experience to share. There is a song called: "Everybody is Worshiping something," I don't think I could have put it better. People tend to find a substitute to fill a need if the real answer can't be found. Every person not following God has chosen to worship themselves or some other god. They assume because the have something trying to fill that need, that the need is being met. Why not question your reality. Seek authority when reason and experience fails you. To some it is a pride issue, believing so strongly in themselves they can't admit there is a need they can't meet. Reality is so much better than substitute, make sure your reality is the true one.

"unknown"

2006-03-26T22:20:00.001-08:00

I am not going to say it all right now. Things are happening right now that are freaking the crap out of me, but at the same time I am also extremely excited. To be honest, I don’t really know what to think of all this. So much has happened in the past week. I feel like I have been hurled into the unknown. Why are we always afraid of the unknown? Even if the “unknown” in our life is set up by God. Well, when is it not set up by God? I guess its just because it is “unknown”, and we as humans have I little trust issue when it comes to, hmm, I guess everything. I would say that despite the fear, I am very excited. God has brought the unknown into my life again, and if it is anything like the last major “unknown’, it will be freaking awesome. So, I am not going to worry, I am not going to fear. I know who my father is.

As I said at the beginning of this post: I will not go into detail about what is going on. I will post later with a more descriptive insight.

More from New Orleans

2006-03-14T20:32:00.000-08:00

Hey y’all,

At least, that is what they say down her in the south. Yes, I am here, and thankfully, alive. It always good to be alive. At least I think so. So, it has been awesome so for, and I am accepting it to stay awesome. It always helps to stay positive. It has been fun and exciting, and when I say ‘fun and exciting’ I mean: Dude!! We are having a freaking awesome time!!!!!! Well, I can only say that for the time starting upon our arrival in New Orleans. By the way, I am a horrible typer. I just thought I would throw that out there. Anyway, our trip down here was indescribable. Ok, now let me try and describe the indescribable: starting from the very beginning… first, the bus was delayed fourteen hours while the group of us waited around in agony, despair, and tiredness. Oh, and how could I forget, playing those stupid games Ben and Linda constantly invented to pass the time. After a long, long, LONG time, the bus finally arrived at TACF. Oh, what a beautiful sight it was. The beautifulness of it all, almost covered up the sheer revoltingness of our transportation for the trip. We all gathered our gear, and loaded it onto the bus. We were off! The bus sure was a sight with its unclean seating arrangements and plugged toilet that continued to give us grief throughout the entire trip.

Throughout the trip, our bus broke down about three time due to a broken fan belt, and other random thing that went wrong. Believe me, there were a lot of them. Our bus was dyeing, it really was with every mile getting longer. Our max speed during the trip was fifty miles an hour and a max of twenty miles an hour while going up hill. A twenty eight hour trip soon turned into a thirty eight hour trip. It was the worst road trip I had ever been on. Actually now that I re-think with the help of Chris, I have now come to realize that the trip was actually kind of fun. Boring situations are always comforted by good friends, which there were a lot of on this trip. Well, by the time we got into New Orleans we were freaking and so desperately wanted to shower. After we showered for as long as we possibly could, we all went to bed, and enjoyed it!

The next day, we woke up and got showered (again). We all got dressed and waited for our bus to take to the outreach headquarters for breakfast, and then to be sent out into different jobs or ministry places. So, after fifty minutes of waiting for our bus drivers with the bus(again), they always seem to be late Hmm…

We arrived at the headquarters with very tired face that were soon eliminated with help of some good donated coffee. After a good breakfast of pancakes and what looked to be eggs and sausage. It wasn’t the best food I’ve ever eaten. After that, the team was sent out into different jobs, I was sent to the warehouse to pack boxes to hand out to people that do not have any to eat at all.

Oh! I just remembered something, during the trip, one of our bus drivers had a bad case of arthritis that was acting way up in her arm. She’s not a Christian(for Now). Linda noticed that she was in pain and went over to her to see if she could do anything to help I.e. pray. Anyway, Linda was able to pray with her and God healed hey. It was sweet. After, she called her mom and told her what had happened. She said to her mom that she still had some pain in her leg, so her mom told her lay her hand on the pain and tell it to go. So, Tamara (girls name) put her and on her leg and told the pain to go and it did.

Later that day we went over to the 9^th ward, it was crazy weird to see all that destruction again. We were unable to go to the lower 9^th ward were all the major damage is because there just is too much debris around. While we were there, we drove into a gas station to turn around, and we hit a piece of debris that laying down on the ground and it punctured our tire. This sucks. At least the wheel was doubled up with another one. We left there and tried to drive pack to the place we were staying.

We ended up stopping at a fast food place and all got out of the bus and went to get some food. After everyone had some food we all piled onto the bus and got ready to go. Ok, this is awesome. Just before we were about to pull out, a tire repair truck was driving by and he said that he was going home to take a shower when he saw us. He said that he felt like he should go over to us and see what was up.(he didn’t know about the flat)

Sweet deal, we got our wheel fixed by some random guy. I love God things. Have you gus ever heard of Dj tietso? Well, he is staying with us for the entire week. Cool, eh? If you have never heard of him, he is a famous Dj from Holland.

Anyway it is just about lights out here at the gym so I have to go. Ciao guys love you all Bren---

Tired, frustrated, and excited...

2006-03-10T23:52:00.000-08:00

Sorry about that last post, I know that it was a bit short. I didn’t have the time to write a huge long story type thing. For that, I apologise. I usually like to write a long list type thing about my life, and about different thing that are going on, but as I said, I didn’t have the time. Also, I am not the best typer out there. Anyway, on Thursday night I stayed up all night doing laundry in preparation for my upcoming missions trip to New Orleans. So, because of some “overloading” issues to do with my drying machine, the drying cycle took over four hours to complete. I was so mad. I wanted to sleep. I guess I don’t always get everything I want in life. Thought so. Anyway, in the end, I ended p getting to sleep at about six thirty, yeah, that’s right, A.M! later, I woke up at about, hmm.., nine A.M. I was so tired, and wanted to go back to sleep, but I knew that I had to get up and continue in my missions trip packing effort. Usually when I go away for a time that is over three days, I like to come home to a nice clean room. I pretty much spent the entire day cleaning my room, packing, and doing various chores around the house. Cleaning my room was very important at this time because during the time that I will be away, my parents are having some relaters come and look at our house in order to put it on the market. We are currently looking at a property two and a half hour north of where we are currently living. So, about three hours and fifteen minutes from Toronto. Although, I am told that this will be a smart move, I have yet to be convinced. I don’t want to move far away from all my family and friends. I really don’t, but, I am willing to step into the water to get my feet wet, I am willing to step into the plans and purposes that God has for me and my family. TOTALLY!!!

Later that day I went down to Toronto where my weekly youth group is held. Me, my dad, and my two sisters, oh, and Josh. We arrived there at about quarter to six. Soon after my arrival, me, Ben, and John learned that there had been several issues concerning the coach buses TACF had ordered prior to that evening. So, instead of leaving at five A.M., we were told that we are going to be leaving at two P.M. that same day. I was so mad! (again). You know, I don’t get mad a lot, I was just frustrated with a lot of thing at that time. So, me, John, and Ben had to go over into the offices and call everyone that had registered for the trip. Now, we started calling these people at about ten P.M. so, I was a little hesitant about calling people. I mean, we had to call some forty-one people. Haha, it was fine though, I’m just glad that most of the people we talked to were totally fine with the idea that they were about to sleep in.

Later, Ben, David, and I, walked up the street to Boston Pizza where we ate food and just relaxed. I am so tired! I can’t ever think straight. Oh well, it will all be fine. I hope. Now, we are just hoping that the bus actually shows up. Carol showed up at BP, and we talked about stuff. Actually we lured her into coming in order fro us to get a ride back to the church. Well, guess what, it worked with the exception of two pieces of pizza. I would say that it was a good deal.

So, now I am sitting in pastor Steve’s office where we wait for the bus. Actually, Ben and Dave are asleep, and for some reason I am having trouble getting there. It is about three in the morning, and I am tired, but I can’t seem to fall asleep. I pray that the bus comes. “that bus will come, and everything will work out according to plan(prophetically)

I am going to be leaving for New Orleans at two, and it will be a fun time(bus ride). I hear that the place that we are staying at has wireless internet. Well, at least, they told me that they were getting it the last time I was there in January. If they do have it, I will be trying to post everyday. So all you guy can the stuff I post on this blog thing. Hurray for Blogs!!!

Anyway, I should get to bed because it is very late, and I should try to get some sleep. Please pray for strength for me. I will need it so much.

Talk to you later Ciao

-Bren

Fear of God vs. Fear of man...

2006-03-08T21:08:00.000-08:00

“The one who I fear the most is telling me not to be afraid”.

PC Sucks...

2006-03-03T19:30:00.000-08:00

You want to know something that is good, but also something I am frustrated with? Just over a year ago, I purchased a brand new computer from Toshiba. Well, I thought I was getting a deal on it because I thought it was a good computer, and I paid about $1,800 CAD. About two months into my ownership, somehow, in someway, my motherboard blew up. I have no idea how it happened. I was so mad and frustrated. Well, I was glad to have purchased a extended two year warrantee. I ended up having to send it into the company to get it fixed. So, about two weeks later I got it back from them and it was fixed. Then, about three months later, the same thing happened again. Anyway, my computers motherboard blew up four times in less than a year. My warrantee expired on January 31, 06. Two weeks before that, my Av adapter broke and I was unable to charge my computer. I sent it into Toshiba, and, later that week, they called me up and told me that they are not going to cover the repairs for it to be fixed. They said that it Had been abused. I was like: what the heck is this?! Here I have a piece if crap computer that cost me everything I had at the time, and I haven’t been able to do my homework because it is always broken. Well, good thing I bought the two year warrantee from Staples Depot. I told Toshiba to send my piece of crap computer back to me so I can fix it myself. So, sent it into Staples and they fixed it.

So, after a year of unwanted mishaps concerning my computer, I now have it back and I’ m writing this at youth in Toronto. After all this, all I can say is: I ABSOLUTELY, PASSIONATELY HATE PC!!! I WANT A MAC!!!!!! I don’t think I can say that enough.

Hmm...

2006-03-02T04:45:00.000-08:00

"Standing in the middle of darkness surrounded by light"

Drowning to learn...

2006-02-24T23:20:00.000-08:00

For its out from under darkness that we truly learn to see.

It says in Romans that we (Christians) should consider that the suffering we go through on a day-to-day basis is unworthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.

Every Christian faces situations and difficulties they just cannot understand and see how to work through. At times like these, the Holy Spirit of God inside of us helps us in our human limitations and weaknesses by interceding for us to God the Father. One way the Spirit of God can intercede for us is by using our heavenly language. As we pray in the Holy Spirit, God can do thing that transcend our human capabilities, and increase our capabilities in the spirit. We can tap into what God us doing by praying for an interpretation of what the Holy Spirit is praying for through us.

As we go through the hard times in our lives, we tend to turn around and curse God with our actions, maybe not with our actual words, but with actions, or attitude. After every hard time or issue that I overcome; I always arise, and walk away a stronger person while leaving all issues and pains in the past. I am currently going through what some might call “Hell”, but personally I cannot say that because I know that what I am going through is nowhere near as painful as hell. I currently know that even though I am going through crap, I know I know I know, that I am going to arise from this, and through it, become a stronger person.

A prayer: Daddy, thank you that no matter what I go through in my life, you are always there for me, and what you say about me always stands strong. Papa, let us have many more ‘milk and cookie’ moments.

Yahweh! You ROCK!!!

My worst dentist experience ever...!!!

2006-02-21T22:11:00.000-08:00

Hello everybody,

I have a funny story for you. Well, today I was scheduled for an appointment at the dentists office. Everything seems fine. So, I get there and I had to wait for like an hour while some other person was getting some work done on their mouth. Anyway, finally after an hour of boring celebrity stories in some near by magazines, a nears came and informed me that it was my turn to be looked at. I was there to get a tooth packed and caped, or pulp caped, as I was told. I walked into the dental room where such procedures take place. There, awaiting me, was the chair of death, well, at least that is the name it had been called by me ever since I had become aware of its endless supply of uncomfortableness, or should I say: Extremely uncomfortable. As you can see, the practical name it has been called seemed to be to long, and to hard to say at all the times it is needed to be said. Thus spawn: “The Chair of Death”. After a brief discussion with the dentist whom is to be performing the cavity extraction, he say me down in The Chair. First he numbed a section of the gums. Then, took a needle with some kind of freezing stuff in it. Now, I have had this done to me before, and for some reason the spray on numbing stuff didn’t really work, yeah. So, here we have a large needle being forced into my gums and into the top of my mouth, and I can totally feel everything because the numbing didn’t work. ARG!!!…PAIN!!!

Next, it was time to wait for the freezing to take affect. Five minutes into the ‘waiting for the freezing’, I mentioned to the nurse that was sitting beside me, that it didn’t really seem to be frozen yet. ME: “um.. Are you sure this freezing thing is working“? NURSE: “yeah yeah… the top part of the mouth always feels different than the bottom” ME “are you sure?… because, I really don’t feel any freezing at all” NURSE “don’t worry, you won’t feel a thing!”

This left me a little confused as to what was really going on. About a minute later the dentist comes in and says: “are you ready?” I then nervously said: “yeah”. All I heard next was the sound of drills, Oh man, do I hate the sound of them. So, he starts to drill and right away, I start to feel it, the pain that is. I don’t say anything just incase it is just me being uncomfortable. All of a sudden he hit’s a nerve, and all I do is just jump of and scream, OUCH OUCH, that really hurt. So, the dentist just looks at me and says “well, I think we should try and freeze it again”. after the second freezing, the same thing happens again. He hit the same nerve again and there I go, jumping up with a whimper of pain. Next comes the third freezing, so, by now my nose is totally frozen, but for some reason my teeth can still feel. Well, guess what, the same thing happens again, and my dentist is getting very frustrated. Here comes the fourth freezing. Now by this time I am in a lot of pain, but, somehow I am laughing at it all, because, c’mon, this is kind of funny eh? Well, it took them a total of five freezings to take the pain go away, and this left , me with a frozen throat, which felt very weird.

Movies these days...

2006-02-18T21:24:00.000-08:00

the other day i was feeling kind of board so I decided to go and watch a movie at a nearby Famous Players. So, I get there, and, like, have noticed lately that all the movies out right now suck? Like seriously. A romantic western about two gay cowboys, or an extremely dark movie featuring twenty minute vampire sex?(hustler style). Anyway, getting away from that, I decided to purchase a ticket to the movie Big Momma’s House 2. Well, at least I tried to. My stupid debit card doesn’t work very well, and I’m not one to carry cash. I was about to pray for my card to work properly like I usually do, but I didn’t really feel like me watching that movie was encouraged by God. Maybe if I felt like that I shouldn’t have tried to buy a ticket for it. After about twenty minutes of humiliation, and embracement, my card finally worked the way it should. From there, it was about a fifty minute wait until the movie began. All I can say is: “thank God I bring my bible and journal wherever I go”. It never matters where I am, God time is always AMAZING!

By the time the movie was about to begin, I had seriously freaked out at least half of the people sitting around me due to some profuse shaking. Haha, it was great. During the previews at the beginning of the movie, I saw a preview for a movie that is so freakishly hilarious I almost peed while watching it, and it was just the trailer for the actual movie. Well, I’m glad that didn’t end up peeing my pants, because, sitting in a movie theater for nearly two hours with semi-soaked pants is not the most comfortable thing around. The trailer was for a movie by the name of Date Movie. I want to see it because I enjoy a good laugh from time to time, but, I must take into consideration what I am laughing at. So, I want to see it, but at the same time, I don’t want to go see a movie where I will end up laughing at something that is wrong. I hate when people laugh at sexual jokes such as when people make fun of homosexuals. I can’t stand it! So, I think I will look into it before I spend money and time to go and see it.

In the end, Big Momma’s House 2 was a good movie. The continuing adventures of master-of-disguise FBI special agent Malcolm Turner. This time he must go undercover as Big Momma to nail his ex-partner's murderer. While undercover in the house of the suspected criminal, Malcom grows attached to the suspect's three childen.

If you end up watching the Date Movie trailer, let me know what you think, is it worth watching? Please let me know

Pride...

2006-02-16T21:47:00.000-08:00

God has a plan for your life. God is perfect, therefore, His plan is perfect.

It is impossible for you with your sin nature to execute the plan of God for your life. Therefore, God has provided through His grace a way for you to execute His plan, purpose, and will during your lifetime.

Whenever a Christian fails in executing the plan of God for his life, sinful pride is the primary reason and motivating cause.

Pride is the basic mental attitude sin. As you will see in this study, sinful pride (or arrogance) precedes and supports all of the sinful mental attitudes the sin nature produces.

Satan was the first creature guilty of pride. His motivation of pride is found in one line of Isa. 14:14. "I will make myself like the Most High God." The original sin of pride is amplified in the following passage.

Ezek 28:14-17. "You were the Anointed Cherub who guards; I placed you there. You were on the holy mountain of God; you walked among the stones of fire. You were blameless in your ways from the day you were created until unrighteousness was found in you. By the abundance of your slander, they filled your inner life with violence and you sinned. Therefore, I have cast you as defiled from the mountain of God. I have excluded you, O Guardian Cherub, out from the stones of fire. Your right lobe was lifted up because of your beauty. You corrupted your wisdom because of your glamour. I have cast you to the earth. I have placed you before kings that they may see you."

Pride is a lofty self-respect totally apart from reality. It is high esteem of oneself from some imagined or real superiority. Pride is the antithesis of grace. The believer who is arrogant is totally blind to the grace of God. Pride is synonymous with vanity, which is empty pride in regard to one's person, attainments, or possessions coupled with an excessive desire to be noticed, a lust for attention, lust for approval or praise from others.
Pride is the pomposity of vain glory. It is supercilious and haughty contempt of others.
Pride supports a whole array of sins, such as jealousy, bitterness, vindictiveness, implacability, revenge motivation, revenge tactics, self-pity, conceit, inordinate ambition and competition, slander, gossip, and maligning. Pride is a mental attitude sin which overflows into the motivation, decision making and activity of the individual. Pride includes several different concepts.

Egotism. This is an excessive preoccupation with self and must be distinguished from ego, which is self-consciousness and is perfectly normal.
Vanity. This is self-admiration and an excessive desire to be admired by others. Hence, vanity is easily flattered and patronized.
Conceit. This is exaggerated estimate of one's abilities and attainments.
Scriptures Related to the Sin of Pride

Prov 11:2, "When pride comes, then come dishonor."
Prov 16:18, "Pride precedes destruction, and before a fall there is a lifestyle of pride."
Prov 23:29, "A person's pride will bring him low, but a lifestyle of humility will attain honor."

Rom 12:3, "For I say through the grace which has been given to me to everyone who is among you, stop thinking of self in terms of pride beyond what you ought to think, but think in terms of sanity for the purpose of being rational without illusion as God has assigned to each one of us a standard of thinking from doctrine."

Pride is defined in terms of the sin of jealousy in

Jam 3:14-16, "But if you have bitter jealousy and inordinate ambition in your right lobe, stop being arrogant, and stop lying against the truth [Bible doctrine]. This pseudo wisdom is not that which comes from above, but is earthly, natural, and demonic. For where jealousy and inordinate ambition exist there is disorder and every evil deed."

Prov 13:10, "Through pride comes strife, but wisdom is with those who receive instruction."

1 Pet 5:5, "Likewise you younger men be subject to the elder [pastor], and all of you cloth yourselves with humility toward one another. `For God makes war against the arrogant, but He gives grace to the humble.' Therefore, humble yourselves under the powerful hand of God, that He may promote you at the proper time."

If God does not promote you, you are not promoted.
God promotes men and women of who have absorbed the Word of God.
God promotes humble or grace oriented people.
Promotion is a matter of doctrinal inculcation and grace-orientation.
Promotion is a matter of glorifying God through the execution of the plan of God for the believer in the Church Age.
Promoted believers are the invisible heroes of the Church Age..

2 Tim 3:2-7 describes facets of pride. "For persons [believers] will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, slanderers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, wicked, without virtue-love, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of God, treacherous, thoughtless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but having denied its power, in fact, avoid such persons as these. And among them [immoral arrogant believers] are those who creep into households and captivates silly women who are loaded down with sins and lead on by their multifarious lusts, always learning but never able to come to metabolized knowledge of the truth."

The Arrogance of Nations Brings Them Under Divine Discipline

Lev 26:19, "And I will break down the pride of your power. And I will make your sky like iron, and your land like bronze."

Isa 9:8-9, "The Lord sends a message against Jacob and it falls on Israel. And all the people know it, that is, Ephraim and the inhabitants of Samaria, who spoke with pride and pride of heart. The bricks have fallen down, but we will rebuild with smooth stones."

Ezek 7:10, "Behold, the day is coming. Your doom has gone forth. The rod of discipline has budded because pride has blossomed."

Pride is Always Related to the Rejection of the Word of God

1 Tim 6:3-4, "If anyone teaches a different doctrine and does not concur with sound doctrine, those doctrines of our Lord Jesus Christ, even doctrines pertaining to godliness [spirituality], he has become arrogant, understanding nothing. Furthermore, he has morbid obsessions about controversies and verbal conflicts from which originate jealousy, discord, evil speculation."

Pride distracts the believer from doctrine. Pride divorces the believer from reality, both personal and historical. Pride is the corruptor of the soul and the sign that the sin nature is dominating the soul.

Pride destroys capacity for life, love, and happiness.

The arrogant person rejects authority. Pride motivates emotional sins, such as: fear, worry, anxiety hatred, anger, violence, murder guilt and guilt complex, self-pity.

Pride reproduces itself in jealousy, bitterness, vindictiveness, implacability, revenge motivation and function, inordinate ambition and competition, gossip, slander, maligning, and judging.

Ramblings...

2006-02-07T22:46:00.000-08:00

When are the times when one is found laying down in silence, repeating heart filled words over and over, with some far off chance it will somehow calm their tangled emotions? Harmonic silence is broken with fear, anger, and worry. A rising is felt as though it is bubbling, and bursting from beneath. White noise pollutes the soul and mind, and keeps these thoughts drowning in question. The bursting, and the bubbling now become more explosive than ever before, stretching, and tearing thinned skin. The pain undertaken is no longer just emotional, but physical. With a final bust of emotion, Like something sounding like a rush of wind, all discomforts and pollutants are ejected from all systems. Though painful, the pain is comforted by the realization of restoration, you are being cleansed. All comes out clear, clear as a peaceful summer morning. No questions, no mysteries, just enjoyment of what is, and always will be, life, the way it can be.

In the end, all is lost, and all is restored to the maximum capacity available.

A new understanding of love

2006-01-30T12:12:00.000-08:00

Jesus is the most enduring love. It is a love that shall never end. Before long, everyone will be done loving this world, even those who love it most and have their hearts most set upon it. Those who now have their hearts full of earth, shall soon have their mouths full of earth, when their bodies lie rotting in the earth, then they will be done loving it. Death, which ends their life in this world, shall end their love to this world, But you, the true lover of Jesus, shall never be done loving him. It is sweet to love Jesus, but this makes it even more sweet to think you shall ALWAYS love him. You will love him in life, love him in death and love him after death. Oh blessed love, that shall never be lost, but last forever! While I was contemplating this, it came into my mind to consider, what those who never love Jesus in this world can love in the next world, and I could not imagine anything which damned souls in hell can love. I thought, can they love God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, angels or believers? No, their hatred to all these is, and shall be, more deeply rooted in them, than it ever was while upon earth. Can they love their 'location' in hell? No, they will wish they never had come there. Can they love the 'pains' of hell? No, they grieve and groan under these torments, and are weary to bear them. Can they love the 'devils' in hell? No, they curse them for tempting them to the sin which brought them to their place in hell. Can they love their 'companions' in hell? No, they are an aggravation of one another's misery. Can they love their 'sin' in hell? Alas! All that was pleasurable in sin is gone, and only the pain and sting of sin remain. Can they love their 'being' in hell? They had rather die than live, and cease to be at all, than to continue to be in hell. I do not know what it is that they can love in hell. Oh its a terrible place, where there is, and can be, no love! Jesus once let me experience the feeling of being in hell, the pain and misery of it all, torments from above cloud your mind, words cannot explain the feeling of that place, Oh, that terrible place, the screaming heard day after day, no one can tell you what this feels like, the thought of screaming from the inside, knowing that there is no hope, no chance for future goals, imagine being stuck in your future. Standing in chambers, not of fire, but shame despair, Something like this can really give you a heart for the lost, walking around soaking in the feces of a lifelong sin, soaked, and continuing. They stand on a rocky cliff that cracks beneath them. They tremble without knowing it, as everything they know, respect and believe in comes crashing down on them. They walk blindly through a valley of death. Oh how lovely is heaven to us! Where love reigns and where love lives! Our life shall be forever a life of love! Dear Lord! Save me from hell, because in hell there is no love to you, nor to anything that is good. Sweet savior! Lead me in the way to heaven, and bring me there, where love to you shall live and last forever.

Faith.

2006-01-26T21:13:00.000-08:00

"'Not called!' did you say? 'Not heard the call,' I think you should say. Put your ear down to the Bible, and hear him bid you go and pull sinners out of the fire of sin. Put your ear down to the burdened, agonized heart of humanity, and listen to its pitiful wail for help. Go stand by the gates of hell, and hear the damned entreat you to go to their father's house and bid their brothers and sisters, and servants and masters not to come there. And then look Christ in the face, whose mercy you have professed to obey, and tell him whether you will join heart and soul and body and circumstances in the march to publish his mercy to the world."

-William Booth

Faith is to believe what we do not see, and the reward of this faith is to see what we believe. You never know how much you really believe anything until its truth or falsehood becomes a matter of life or death to you.

excitement...........?

2006-01-24T09:04:00.000-08:00

Well, it’s a new day and all I can say is; I’m drained. The main reason for this is because I have been sick for the past three days. If you were to see me on Sunday; you would have probably noticed that I was a bit “out of it”. I couldn’t seem to concentrate on anything. I didn’t know what was wrong with me. Later that night, at TACF central, people came up to me to talk. I was like in a daze for the entire time they were talking to me. I felt badly after, because I wasn’t really paying attention to them. So, if you are one of those people, let me apologize.

Yesterday was freaking nuts! I had about three summative projects to hand in. the night before, I stayed up till about 2:30 am. The projects I had to hand in, includes: a two thousand word summary of a life’s work of two photographers, (Goldsworthy and wall), a comparative essay on religious wedding traditions over 2,200 words, a summary and portfolio of my trip to New Orleans including photos, and a media presentation. As you can see this is a lot of work, and I only had a week to do it. For all of last week I was majorly stressed out of my mind. So, today I’m feeling awesome. Well, with the exception of some minor sickness. (ish)

I’m so excited for tonight! Tonight, Ben Kennedy and Mel Jeffrey are starting a youth night/cell/hangout place that will totally rock. I’m also excited because I can finally start my own cell group. This is good because I have been waiting a long time for this. Godly excitement rocks!!!...

I’m writing this at school because my internet is down at house.

New Orleans

2006-01-16T14:45:00.000-08:00

Yes! I cannot tell you how good it feels to be back home and back into glorious Blogdom. I have just returned from a missions trip to New Orleans where we (an awesome team from TACF) helped out with the clean up. Me and the team drove from TACF in three rental vans. On the way down, one of the vans was driving through an intersection when a red Honda Civic came out of nowhere and slammed right into the van. The Civic totally smashed out the front of the van making it unsuitable for driving. After the driver of the Civic realized what had happened, he immediately took off in what remained of his car, thus making it a hit and run. So, this left us with a damaged car in the middle of an intersection with the entire team freezing their buts off in a gas station parking lot.
Kate Smith called the car rental place and informed them of our discouraging night. This all happened in Detroit around 11:30 pm. by the way. The rental place wanted us to drive in the morning to Windsor, and pick up another rental van. So, Kate, being the master negotiator that she is somehow got them to drive out to us a fresh new van for us to continue our journey in. Around 2:30 am.

After that it was about a thirty hour drive to New Orleans. It was a long drive, but totally worth it. We arrived in New Orleans at nine thirty pm, and shortly after got settle into our quarters for the week. The next morning we went to the church where we volunteered at(Victory Fellowship). For the first day, Ben Kennedy and I worked in the warehouse packing boxes of donated food to hand out to the many people that come everyday that desperately need food and supplies. So many people came through everyday to get food, and everyone had a story to tell about there family and house, even their trucks.

The next day a few of us were in the kitchen cooking food for more than two thousand. The kind of cooking has been going on since shortly after Katrina. It was hard work but well worth it. There is a tent set up on the front lawn of the church. They have more than 700 people come through there each day for food. a lot of the team was on the line giving out food. Just seeing so many people hungry and tired really tugs at my heart. People would line up for as long as they had to just to get a hot meal. As the people were lining up, Andrew would go up and down the line praying for people and asking how they’re doing. Just being there for them.

On the third day we went down to of Victories major outreach places. Here, we fed people that would line up for food. After they would get their food they would go and sit down at some tables that we set up for them to eat at. Some of the team that wasn’t helping serve food would go and sit down with them and talk to them. We would just be there for people to talk to. They would eat while listening to a live worship band. I was talking to an old man by the name of Fred. He was telling me that before the hurricane his wife was very sick and he was really scared as to what he was going to do about it. Well, his wife died about two weeks before the hurricane. He was telling me how glad he was that she died before Katrina and not during. He lost his house in the storm. He has nothing. He was saying that he has given up on everything because he has lost everything. He said he has nothing to for. It was very hard for me to hear this because my heart was already spilling out all over the place. I paused for a sec, but Holy Spirit showed up, just like he always does and gave me the perfect words to say that spoke into his life and gave him comfort. I was able to pray with him and through that, put a smile on his face.

One of the days we were there, we went down to the 9th ward where the levee broke. I was shocked! I didn’t know that it was so bad. The media doesn’t cover it like I used to. People think that it is all better and people down there are doing well and surviving. Whoever thinks that is dead wrong. It looks like a third world country. Like a bomb went off. I saw a barge in the middle of a neighborhood. I saw houses in the middle of streets, houses collapsed, and on top of cars. People are still finding the dead in many places, like under pieces of wood, or stuck to the side of a wall inside a house. I was talking to a woman when I was down there, and she said “a few weeks ago I went to see if my parents were ok. When I opened the door I saw my parents stuck to the wall of their house”. Only God can give you the words to sat to that.

On the last day of our trip, Thomas and I were al set to go back out to Carlton and Clayborn for some ministry stuff. These plans were soon interrupted when one of the jr. pastors of Victory came up to us and said they were short a couple of people to gut out houses. Thomas wanted to do it, but I didn’t. inside I was like ‘its my last day and I don’t want to do this on my last day’. I found myself saying, “if its needed of me, I will do it”. So, off we went to gut a house owned by a woman who had lost everything in the flooding. The mold was very bad inside the house so, we had to wear full body suits and face masks. Oh, and gloves. Those suites were so extremely hot, especially since we were working in temperatures of around thirty degrees Celsius. We were sweating like pigs. Our clothes were completely soaked in sweat. Overall I was glad I said yes to gutting the house. I was glad to serve.

It was an amazing time and I’m eager to go back.

You can look at more picture if you click on my Flickr thingy.

they act on what they don't know

2006-01-01T23:45:00.000-08:00

Each year more than 30,000 persons in the United States take their own life. Suicide is the eighth leading cause of death and the third leading cause among persons who are 15 to 24. More persons die by suicide than by homicide. Each year nearly 500,000 persons make a suicide attempt serious enough to receive emergency room treatment. Millions have suicidal thoughts.

These numbers, I know, speak of individuals whose stories and relationships are unique. They speak of persons with whom we live in our families, congregations, neighborhoods, and work places. Some of us have attempted suicide, and others of us have made sure a relative or friend who is threatening suicide gets help. Many of us have mourned and anguished over the suicidal death of a loved one, and others of us will some day experience such unspeakable grief and suffering.

Suicide testifies to life's tragic brokenness. I believe that life is God's good and precious gift to us, and yet life for us ourselves and others sometimes appears to be hell, a torment without hope. When we would prefer to ignore, reject, or shy away from those who despair of life, we need to recall what we have heard: God's boundless love in Jesus Christ will leave no one alone and abandoned. We who lean on God's love to live are called to "bear one another's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ". Have hope in God amid suffering and adversity, and have love for our troubled neighbor.

Increasingly, suicide is being viewed as a serious and preventable public health problem. Suicide and its prevention are complex and multi-dimensional and need to be approached openly and comprehensively. Suicide prevention requires concerted and collaborative efforts from all sectors of society.

I’m so tired of seeing this problem in the world. Seeing youth thinking they have nothing left to live for. “Trying to find a way out of it”. Till everything comes to a crashing halt assisted by the sound of a gunshot or the sound of wind breezing through wavy hair while falling from an unimaginable height. Our society is just ‘setting’ up the youth of today for suicide. The media plays an enormous roll in influencing are young people. The median tells us that we aren’t pretty enough, or not good enough. It teaches us in movies that we have to strive to be accepted by society. Our music tells us that we have nothing to live for and that everything sucks and that we should always be angry at the world. Influence. We are being offered and fed. We eat.

Our youth cries out and acts on it because they know nothing else. They cry out. God has given me a heart for the young people of today. He gave it to me just after I was released from the deadly grip of suicide.

new year goals

2006-01-01T01:16:00.000-08:00

I cannot believe that another year has come and gone and that it is 2006 already. I can just remember about sever years ago sitting in front of the T.v. late one December evening, it was new eve years actually. I can just remember me sitting in front of the T.v. watching ‘Gone With The Wind’(board to tears) with my ever so faithful mother, sharing laughs and tears. Don’t get me wrong it is a good move, just not one that I look forward to watching on new years eve.

I have decided to post up some thing that I look forward and/or want to accomplish in the new year.

1. Be more outgoing

2. Become more closer with my family.

3. Become EXTREAMELY close with my brother.

4. Learn how to play my trumpet better.

5. Find a better plan for my cell phone.

6. Visit my family in Switzerland and than backpack around Europe for a month.

7. Buy a Powerbook.

8. Learn a new language.

9. Become an insanely good freeride and XC biker.

10. Have more ‘moments’ with God

11. Have more God time.

12. More worship time.

13. Finish reading my Bible.(memorize)

14. Learn how to love people more.

15. Start up my own cell.

16. Learn to be more courageous.

17. Learn to trust God with my life more than I do now.

18. Be more patient, less of A perfectionist.

19. Go into bigger and better places lead by Jebus.

20. Learn to use my spiritual giftings better and more often.

21. Learn more about myself.

22. Learn to be more passionate about the thing I am passionate about.

23. Re-kindle old friendships.

24. To have a better understanding of the relationship I have with Jesus. And to get used to the idea of being a ’Bride’.

25. To be more focused.

26. To become more involved with my church. (Toronto Airport Christian Fellowship)

27. Get a chance to do some street ministry.

28. To have “many” more ‘milk and cookie’ moments with Jesus. (frequently)

29. Get a better job that I do enjoy and that pays more.

30. Get more non-Christian friends.

31. Buy an Ipod.

32. Spend many good memorable times with close friends.

33. Getting my g1, then getting my g2.

34. Keeping all the good aspects of ‘Brendan’.

35. To be, and to remain passionately, romantically in love with my creator.

There is no specific order to this they are all just random.

'gangsta'

2005-12-30T20:02:00.000-08:00

Awe, I’m sorry about that previous post. It was very depressing, and I don’t like writing things that are depressing.

So, here’s a story that is slightly less depressing.

The other day I was at work, and you know, I was having a good night. All was good. Then out of nowhere comes up one of the guys I’m working with. Now, this guy is one of those ghetto pimp type people. So he was all like “Bap! Bap! I’ll cut you! I‘m not afraid of you guy, I‘ll cut you up till you are all cut up, and bloody”. so he’s swinging some punches at me, and I tried to avoid him. Well he got a bit too close and punched me right in the face. Just imagine it, I got punched in the face by a ‘gangsta’. my nose still hurts.

It was funny though, right when he hit me he started to freak out and apologies. He was so scared that he may have caused damage to my face and nerves. So much for the stereotype ‘gangsta’.

So, I was all like “its ok man, don’t worry”.

don’t worry, he’s forgiven. (my face still hurts)

abused flourishment

2005-12-28T23:31:00.000-08:00

Hey people,

Well, the people that read my blog. I don’t think there are many of you.

Aww, I’m so tired right now I can’t think straight. There are so many things that are going on in my life that sometimes I don’t even have time just to sit down and think about them. Sometimes I don’t even think about taking all my issues to the foot of the cross. I don’t think sometimes that all I need to do is just talk to Jesus. Sometimes I am so prideful that I will not take anyone else’s opinion. I’m so stuck up on myself its nauseating. I can describe myself in one word: ‘tired’. it can mean so many things. Weary, exhausted, worn-out, drained, bushed, sleepy, drowsy, fatigued, beat, wiped out, dog-tired, all in, done in, tired out, spent, shattered, and whacked. I could probably think of many more words that describe my state as is.

So, I am awake right now because I could not sleep. You know when there are so many things rushing through your head faster than the speed of sound? I get so worked up over it that sometimes I lose myself in my mind. I know this is not very healthy. It seems that I am always trying to find myself. I’m always trying to find myself, and yet, I always know where I am and who I am. I guess I do know who I am, and its like I don’t want to believe it. I want a better me I guess. Its like I can see me, but I don’t like it. I guess I’m on a constant journey to find a better more appealing me.

I need to realize that I am who I am. There is no other me. I cannot find one better. All I can do is improve on the foundation of myself. I don’t really know exactly what I am saying.

“I am as a plant, growing in water provided by my Master. I use the water I need to grow and flourish in what has been provided. I do no think of what sacrifice has been paid for me to have water. Such things do not enter my mind. I just drink my fill without thinking. Not realizing where this much desired water comes from. I just drink my fill and don’t think about it. I have abused my master and His water witch He so generously gives to me for my use. For my use. Me use can mean so many things that where not intended for the masters water. This Holy water. How can I drink and not think about where the water that keeps me alive comes from? I abuse my rights.”

When we flourish in His freely given water that I use to stay alive, and do not give anything back. Why? Why does this happen?

Shattered walls

2005-12-26T22:13:00.000-08:00

Breaking into open waves half peaked, as they bulge up from the surface. I plunge into them with a somewhat glorious fear, and a scrap of hesitation in the back of my mind. My walls start to crack as shots of water burst through tiny cracks in my walls. My walls come crashing down to the ground into uncountable numbers of pieces. Fear starts to fill my head showing no signs of dissipation. The fear that I have for myself continues to fill my head until it spreads to my spine and body. I am trembling with fear. Suddenly this overwhelming fear takes a jump and skyrockets into unimaginable heights before it come crashing to a halt. I feel a calmness come over me that I can not explain. I look to the sky in confusion. Suddenly four great towers shoot up from out of the water and as they rise my walls start to rebuild themselves. These great and mighty towers which once acted as corner stones in the foundation of my being. These towers that my house was lacking upon impact of my downward spiral in life.

Before I was naked, I was without supports to hold me together. I went charging into battle without the much needed protection that my being has desired since the beginning of time. Jesus has come into my life and has been my supports. He has rebuilt my walls and has made me complete. Thank you Jesus!!!!!!!!!

come and gone, but not forgotten...

2005-12-26T15:29:00.000-08:00

Wow, I cannot believe it. Christmas has come and gone and I don’t really feel like it ever happened. Well, it did. There is something about Christmas that makes you just feel so warm inside. This feeling is always assisted by the giving of presents. I think I did well this year as far as gift giving. It’s funny, earlier this month I was looking into getting an Ipod 60 G. you know, the new video one. I was so close to buying one but I felt guilty buying so much for myself. I mean that’s a lot of money for me. It would have cost about $570. After taxes.

And then I went Christmas shopping. Haha. Well, I have eight people to buy for just in my family. I ended up paying much more than the cost of an Ipod. It’s funny how hesitant people can be when they are buying for themselves, but when an opportunity comes around to spend money on others, they go all out in finding the best possible present they can get, and they stop at no price. That was me this year. To be honest, I would rather spend that money($570) on family and friends then spend it on myself. As much as I want an Ipod, I’m happy with the investment I have made in my family. I’ll get one some day.

There are about five families in the Serez family. Usually we spend hundreds of dollars on gifts for the other families. So, this year instead of spending so much money on stupid things that we probably already have or will loose interest within the same day received. Each of the families gave a certain amount of money into a pot. With this money, we paid to have a well drilled for a small town in Africa that is currently drinking water that Is unclean. I’m excited about this because a friend of ours is going to Africa with our money and a camera, and is going to tape the whole thing. I think he is going to send or mail the tape to us and when we get it the entire Serez family is going to sit down and watch it, and the see the difference that we have made in the town the well was drilled.

I hope we continue to do this every year.

-Bren

Christmas Eve"

2005-12-24T20:27:00.000-08:00

I cannot believe that it is already Christmas eve. Another year has gone by since last eve(obviously) I don’t know, it just doesn’t feel like it. So, many things have happened this year that I cannot believe actually happened. Like, getting attacked by that very vicious dog, or falling off the roof into a bush hiding lawn ornaments(ouch). Metal sure hurts when it hits you in the crotch.

I just got back from my grandparents house where we had an amazing dinner prepared by my grandmother. She is so cool and I love her very much. One of my uncles(Phillip)bought a hockey slapshot table which was enjoyed by the entire Serez family(profusely). My family is so generous, I love it. We played the gift exchange game. It was fun. There are about 16 grandchildren in the Serez family, myself included. The ages differ between 18 and 2 years. Each kid was asked to make(hand make)a gift for the person they were given (name in a hat). I was given the mane of my 2 year old cousin Ben. I made him a very nice (large) shelf cabinet to hang on the wall in his bedroom. I think he liked it.(???)

Anyway, tonight , as is tradition in the Serez family, (starting tonight)ha ha. We cut huge blocks of ice out of the lake(my grandparents live on a lake)using a chain saw, and made candle holders out of them. They were very nice. We also made an ice bowl for the desert(jello). i'm afraid i must cut this post short because i'm going to hang out with my brother,Yes!!!

Cry out in song and praise for tis the Lords Birthday, all bow to the worthyness and might of His majesty. Around since the beggining of time and to the end of eternity, praise Him!!! Happy Birthday Jesus!!!!!!!!!!!!

-Bren

stress is at times "choice"...

2005-12-23T16:38:00.000-08:00

So, today was my last day of school before the Christmas break. I feel less stressed out at the moment. I don’t think that that will last for long because I have to catch up on some work that will be due for when I go back to school. I need to work my but off 110%(with but working off action) during the break. If I don’t I may fail one of my classes. I really don’t want to fail because I need every credit I can get my hands on. Another reason I have to work myself to the limit of maximum stress I because I am going to New Orleans in January. I will be out of school for the first week only. All my work must be done before I go.

I have about four summative projects to finish during the Christmas holidays or else I am totally screwed. So, I am totally stressed out of my mind right now(please pray for me). I know that I will be fine, but at the same time I have a bit of hesitation that is causing me to worry. Stupid worrying ness! BTW, all of these projects are very big and time consuming(lots of essaying).

I’m so excited about going to New Orleans but at the same time I am very scared. I wouldn’t call it hesitation. Its more a fear of mine, worrying about my own personal performance. Why must my life be full of worry?!!! I know the answer to that. Choice. Me making a choice to believe the lies of Satan through the people around me. Jerk.

One day very soon I will get a spiritual smack in the head(looking forward to it), one that I need very much. I continue to learn about this amazing thing: “choice” and not so amazing… actually, it is fully amazing, its all up to you. You can make “choice” bad or you can make it good. It all depends on the way you use it. "choice"

-Bren

glory of...

2005-12-23T08:40:00.000-08:00

Exodus 33:12-34:7
The more I learn about worship and God and the worship of God, the more that I learn that we can only meet God on His terms. We can tell God what we would like to experience with Him, but it always comes down to His way, not our way.Moses wanted to see God's glory. He wanted to look at God full on. God's response wasn't "Here you go!" and BOOM!, Moses gets a full glimpse of God. God in all of His graciousness, says, "I will cause all my goodness to pass in front of you, and I will proclaim my name, the LORD, in your presence. I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion. But," He said, "you cannot see my face, for no one may see me and live." (Exodus 33:19,20).God also said to Moses that it wasn't time for Him to reveal His goodness. He tells Moses to come back in the morning, and gives him instructions on what it is he needs to do to prepare for the encounter.Almighty God of the universe would like to meet with us. We can approach the Throne of Grace with confidence (Hebrews 4:15-17), but we can only enter into the Holy presence of God covered with the blood of Jesus (Hebrews 10:18-20). Let's press into God the Father, but let's keep in mind that we need to do so with great respect and reverence.

I have a better idea.

2005-12-22T20:14:00.000-08:00

For those of you that have been reading my posts, I thank you. Also, I fear that you may not understand this. For those of you that have not, you will not understand a word of this, so, bare with me.

Today, I stepped off the train. Yes, that’s right. I pushed open those welded doors that were keeping me locked away. I reached for the brake and pulled it back as the train came to a screeching halt. I don’t know where it came to a stop. all I know is that I am free. I am walking around right now , enjoying the scenery. It’s beautiful! There are so many thing s that I see now that I could not see before. Everything seems to be in slow motion. I am no longer confined to the horrific chambers of the train where I spent so many wasted years of my life. No more!!!

Its like I am in a whole new world. Different customs, language, whether, scenery, and clearness. No, I have not lost my mind. Haha, I’m just a tad weird, in a good way. I think.

a life painting

2005-12-18T21:13:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I wish I could take all the emotion and pain in my life and just throw it into a huge bucket and start to stir it around until it is fully mixed. Then I would take that bucket and splash it onto an enormous canvas that stretches across a room the size of a football field. I would start to create something beautiful out my disgusting mental excrement.

Half way through this, I start to realize that this painting I am working on only describes the way I felt during the time I was making it. I would have to be constantly making different paintings that will always show what sort of state I am at. This would keep on going like this for the rest of my life until the day I die. I would be producing a different painting every millisecond throughout the day. A painting for every feeling. A paint drip for every bump or scar along the way.

Suddenly realize something. I drop my bucket and my paintbrush and fall to the ground and start to cry and weep. What have I done? I have put my trust in something that has caused me to fall and seek protection in a life full of lies that convince me to fall.

I have not been trusting the creator of the universe. I have been trying to make sense of my life by doing it on my own. Not trusting the Father. I have failed.

I stumble as I rise to my feet. I pick up my bucket then I pick up my paintbrush and I say these words: “Father God, I have not been trusting you to paint my picture for me. I have been trying to do it on my own. D addy, I now realize. I cannot do it on my own. I need you to guide me and help me alone the way. Though there be struggles and obstacles, we will face them together.”

I turn my face to the unfinished canvas and say: Daddy, lets paint it together.

my daddy is so strong and so mighty

2005-12-17T21:24:00.001-08:00

At the beginning of today I found myself unhappy. I felt sad for some reason (no idea why). So after that I asked God to totally fill me consuming abundant amounts of joy. And he told me that I was going to have an amazing night at work. He said it will be totally stress free and that I would enjoy it.

For those of you that don’t know, I am currently working at Swiss Chalet in Newmarket. I have been working there for the past six months. Before that I was without a job for three months, and before that I worked at Toppers Pizza in Newmarket for nine months. I quit that job due to poor management and the fact that I had a new boss every week. Anyway I’m getting off topic here haha (you think?)

For the past Six months of working there I have never enjoyed a single night of work. (I hated it)

So, I went into work knowing that I was going to have an awesome night. Not a good night, an awesome night.

You know what? I had an awesome night. Everything went awesome. I never got stressed, I didn’t get mad, I didn’t get pissed off, and I didn’t freak out. I laughed and joked and had fun for the entire night. I also got to share Jesus with two guys who I have been on my heart lately. Yes, that was also awesome.

My daddy is so awesome. Oh how I love him and all that He does for me.

I just thought of something very funny that happened tonight.

I was cleaning spits with a hose that uses beyond boiling hot water. Were talking water that is so hot that you could fill a bucket with the water and drop an egg in and it would be fully cooked in a matter of minutes. By the way, a spit is a long metal rod that is used for the rotisserie chicken. Anyway I was cleaning it with the hose and I accidentally dropped the hose (it was still on) and it landed on the ground and then the water shot back up straight into my crotch. I cannot tell you or describe the amounts of pain that shortly ensued after that painful blast of hot water. I was in pain for many minutes after that. Ouch ouch ouch!!!

I have no idea

2005-12-17T12:10:00.000-08:00

hello,

The reason i have not been writing any posts lately is because I have been at a loss. A loss of words that is. I feel like i am at a state of nothing. Wait, thats not the right word. I feel like i am living life and i dont have an oppinion about it. It's like i dont feel it. Like its just there, passing me by. "IM standing on a train that is moving at light speed. The brake is broken and the doors are welded shut. As the train goes along, traveling on a journey through a distant void. I see friends pass by on the outside of the welded doors. They can't open. I see my life pass by me faster than my train of thought. I can't start thinking about one before another memory flys by. I'm not explaining this very well am I? I have no time anymore to do the things i would like to do. Like hanging out with my friends.

I dont really know what i am saying exactly. My mind is compleatly blank.

FREEDOM!!!

2005-12-16T22:10:00.000-08:00

In all these days i have lived and died. Blead for a cause of importance to thee. Blood washes over. Cleanses.

In all these times my chapped lips can only screem out one word.

FREEDOM!!!!!!!!!

Goldsworthy

2005-12-13T10:02:00.001-08:00

Have you ever heard of the famous sculpter and photographer: Andy Goldsworthy?
I'm currently studying his work in one of my classes.
He is brilliant!! The work he does is fantastic.

Here are a few images of his work.

"Agape ME"

2005-12-12T19:17:00.000-08:00

At times like these. Looking at life. It all seems so simple, and yet… So hard. Allow me to write it out for you.

Waking from a peaceful slumber witch feels like it has endured for years. Entering into a new dawn. I can feel the warmth of the sun on my face as it assists in my waking. Rising up from out of the blankets and sheets, stretching my arms into the heavens felling the magnificent glory all around. This heat enters through my window, constantly moving in different patterns that are constantly changing. Everything seems so slow… and yet, so fast.

Suddenly, the wake up call sounds, and my once glorious fantasy has formed into reality. My day has started. Will this day be full of myself or the world or maybe my goal of my life will achieved? I cannot tell.
I see new faces wherever I go, each face I know, but is not know past physical image. I know nothing else.
What good is this relationship? “Same distant relations”. Same relations that stay the same. Why do I not engage in this? I see a chance, and yet I do not take it. The answer lies in what is known. What is known in the heart. “The gut feeling” that is not self-created and not self-glorified.

Crying from the inside. Bleeding from the soul.

“Choices”. That’s what it is. You have the choice to have a good day or a bad one. Its your choice.
At the end of the day you find yourself crying out into the heavens. Crying out into the void of your self pity. You wonder why there are no answers coming to you. Its because you already know. You know why.
You find yourself again shouting out “Why! Why! Why!” in all directions. A voice calls to you and says: “You are merle a babe in early stages of sleeping giant”. The answers suddenly hit me like a sack of bricks over and over. How shamed I felt. Trying to hide my embarrassment. Through all these times of unknowing. how amazing is the grace of the Father? No matter what kinds of screw ups I have I am never shunned out of his grace. Jesus and his grace are always waiting for to run into their arms with my troubles…. And waiting for me with milk and cookies.

That was my day in a nut shell.
-Ciao

Wierd picture i created

2005-12-12T09:15:00.000-08:00

Check out this sweet picture I made in my media arts class at school the other day.

I named it “Poems of the Mind”.

I made this picture to tell a bit all about the different things that I think about.

I am not very artistic but hey, if it can get me an A(witch it did) then I am happy.

Not to say that I am not happy all the time, because most of the time I am.

Its just a scramble of many different things.

My Daddy made this

2005-12-10T19:25:00.000-08:00

How AMAZING is God and his creation? Seriously! Look at this picture. I don’t think even a MAC could create a picture like this. The first time I saw this picture I was so overwhelmed with the beauty of God's creation. Sometimes we take it for granted when we complain about our lives that we think are horrible. Don’t you think that the creator of the universe knew what he was doing? A lot of the time we are so hateful of our lives and so untrusting of the Lords total and abundant care over them. When we have that attitude we are basically telling God that He doesn’t know what he is doing, that He is doing it all wrong.

When I feel this way I always look at the Lords creation. I look at it and find it magnificent, awesome, and amazing. When I look it I feel satisfied with my life. I also encounter a whole new slap in the face of realization that basically says: I the Father God Creator of the universe could create the whole world in six days and critique it to magnificent details and pour His heart into it and take care and while holding all creation in the palm of His hand, then I am positive that he has me in His arms and has a purpose for me and a reason for where I am at in life.

So, when you are feeling confused with who you are, just look at creation and you will find yourself. You will like who you see.

Awesome Night

2005-12-09T22:16:00.000-08:00

I just got back from TACF youth and im so tired I just want to go to bed but I want to write this before I forget because I cant remember things very well.

Tonight was AMAZING!!! Really, it was. The Holy Spirit was moving so fast throughout everyone standing up worshipping God. It felt like fire, fire that was pouring out of the heavens like a waterfall soaking everyone and them burning them in the glory. I was in AWE of it. Every time I go to a youth meeting or young adult night I am always so amazed by how powerful the Father is. He is always more powerful than my previous encounter of Him.
I love the leaders we have within youth network, they are amazing people that always give all of themselves to everyone. I don't really know how they do it. I takes some mad skill. Anthony and Susie truly are mighty mighty people in the Kingdom.

These pix are from tonight. They are not very good but I like to have picture with every post I make. (if you hadn't noticed)

Confused and Fustrated

2005-12-08T20:50:00.000-08:00

Hello

Today I woke up at 8:35, yeah I know a bit late Eh? Well, I accidentally set my alarm for that time when I really wanted to set it for an hour earlier. So I woke up and looked at the clock and started freaking out because I need to be out the door heading for the bus at 8:35. I threw some old clothes on and some socks and ran upstairs, threw some shoes on and then ran for the bus not noticing that I had forgotten to put my earrings in*(I take them out at night). If you did not know I have 3/4 " holes in my ears. So I spent the entire day without my earrings(I hate that).

The real reason I am writing this post is because I have been felling like I have been out of the circle of people. Do you know what I mean? The circle of people that everybody knows and is fiends with. I don't say this to say that I am a fan popularity, because I'm not. I'm just saying that I have been feeling really left out.

I feel like I am outside of the circle, just walking around minding my own business, but I have an inner feeling of being left out. I am not lonely because I have my Jesus and he is so cool and an amazing friend to have, but at the same time I feel, you know what I am thinking of a better explanation of this but I cant, all I can say is I feel outside the circle.

When I think about it I then start to realize that I really don't want some of the things that the people inside the circle have. You know what? I don't really know what I am talking about, I have started this post talking about something totally different than what I am talking about now. I now have brand new realization of this. Awesome.

Okay, let me try and sum it up for you.
Most of the time in my life I am surrounded in good amazing friends that I am close with. During those times I am very happy with who I am and the state of myself. There are only very rare times when i feel like an outsider who is outside of the circle. This feeling will pass will pass. Jesus will help me get through it.(always does)

Wow! I feel sorry for the few of you that read my blog.
My apologies.

a cry from undeveloped mouths

2005-12-06T20:51:00.000-08:00

Every week in Canada 300 children are sacrificed to the power that drives abortion.
That is one child sacrifice every 5 minutes.
"Since 1970, the year Canada's abortion laws began to unravel, over 1.7 million Canadian Children have had their brief and precious lives deliberately terminated." These 1.7 million children included friends I would have had, co-workers I would have worked with, brothers and sisters in Christ I would have 'ran-for-Christ' with...ones I would have laughed, cried, and changed the world with.
A devourer has come in the night and robbed a generation.
The powers that drive abortion are feasting.
The heart of God is bleeding.
I am becoming increasingly convinced by the Holy Spirit that silence is no longer an option on this issue.
I believe the Lord is listening from heaven for a voice...a voice that will synchronize it's cry with the sound of the blood that cries out from the land.
I believe that voice that the Lord is listening for is ours.
That is why this page is here.
I will be posting whatever I can to inform you, or connect you to those who can inform you, on this issue that is so close to the heart of God for Canada.
I am a believer that God loves LIFE (alot).
Their blood cries out.

In the next few years abortion is going to emerge as an issue of primary concern for the Church in Canada once again. This is in forerunner stage at this moment but a burden will begin to fall (and already has) regarding this justice issue. The youth will lead the way in effectively petitioning for life in the next leg of the fight against abortion. Parliament must hear from the emerging generation. They will be given a burden and a word. They are not to advance hastily however. I will give discernment and strategy to them and will confirm it with my presence and favour.We are entering an age where there will be a major battle between the issues of life and death.

"The youth of today"

2005-12-05T10:14:00.000-08:00

The Lord would say to the youth of this nation—be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His mighty name. For the enemy has come against this generation with a great cloud of destruction and devastation. He has proposed to overtake you and to yoke you with death and hopelessness. He has sought to bring you into a of such destruction, where you see no hope for your future, so that you would even have the appearance of a generation with no form—no purpose—no hope—no vision. Yet the Lord would say is this not like unto the days when my spirit did brood over creation. And creation did sit in a state of "nothingness" where it was formless and void and had no purpose. And yet my Spirit did come upon this mass of nothingness and did brood and I commanded from it form and life and purpose says the Lord. And is this not like the days where I took Ezekiel by my hand to the valley of bones where a great army, a great people did lay, heaped bone upon bone—with no life, and no strength, no force and no purpose. And yet the breath of my word and of my spirit did come forth with might and raise up the dry bones unto destiny and life and did make them into an exceedingly great army! For I have purposed, and will do by my command says the Lord to again breath life. And I will breath upon this generation and they will rise up as an exceedingly great host--filled with the strength and vigor and empowerment of my spirit. And they will rise up with great strength as ones who withhold nothing and who will fear nothing, for they are ones who have nothing to lose. Will I not confound the enemy and use the very thing which he has attempted to overtake to rise up in greatness and push back the Kingdom of darkness? It is my purpose to do such a thing in your midst says the Lord.

Amazing friends

2005-12-02T20:36:00.000-08:00

I have been crazily amazingly blessed with a lot of super amazing friends. I thank God for it everyday(and more).

One of my super amazing friends shared this amazing and very true quote with me tonight:

"A true friend is someone you can sit with in silence and still feel that you've had the best conversation you could."
-C.S. Lewis

will they rise?

2005-11-28T20:25:00.000-08:00

"So I prophesied as I was commanded by God: and as I prophesied, there was a noise, and behold a shaking, and the bones came together, bone to his bone."

Can the dry bones in this generation rise?

Not as bad as I thought

2005-11-28T19:40:00.000-08:00

so, yesterday was my birthday and actually it wasn't bad at all. I spent the weekend at Ben Kennedy's house, just hanging out with very close friends. Oh, man I really needed that weekend to just relax and take time to get away from the busyness of my life and that is exactly what we did. On Sunday morning I attended my usual SOC class. It was the last class before the exam and it was an awesome class. During ministry time we prayed and prophesied over people for destiny and to have a re-encounter with Jesus. I don't think that was coincidence. I need to study for my exam. After that Ben and I went to the square one mall just to hangs out and talk about stuff. It was great because the whole time god was just pounding the crap out of me about how much he has planned for my future. Than followed by a very good lecture about my destiny. I was just bathing in his presence. I have been dreading my birthday for a while because I didn't want to get older because I had been worried about the destiny god has for me. Its funny, I have no problem trusting god with other things. The day was awesome and more amazing than I had ever thought it could be. I had a family birthday party at my house Monday night. My grandparents were there and my uncle and my auntie from Switzerland. It was fun to spend time with my close family. Oh yeah! My entire family of nine was there. And Caroline my brothers girlfriend.

God thank you so much for amazing friends and family.

These picture were taken on Monday night at the party. (I was SO tired)

Are you busy?

2005-11-25T17:54:00.000-08:00

SATAN'S MEETING:
Satan called a worldwide convention of demons.? In his opening address he said,
"We can't keep people who love God from going to Church"
"We can't keep them from reading their Bibles and knowing the truth."
"We can't even keep them from forming an intimate?relationship with?their Saviour."
"Once they gain that connection with Jesus, our power over them is broken."
"So let them go to their Churches; let them have their covered dinners BUT steal their time, so they don't have time to develop a relationship with Jesus Christ.."
?"This is what I want you to do," said the devil:
"Distract them from gaining hold of their Saviour and maintaining their day!"
"How shall we do this?" his demons shouted.
"Keep them busy in the non-essentials of life and invent innumerable schemes to occupy their minds," he answered.
"Tempt them to spend, spend, spend and borrow, borrow, borrow."
"Pursuade the wives to go to work for long hours and the husbands to work 6-7 days each week, 10-12 hours a day, so they can afford their empty lifestyles"
"Keep them from spending time with their children"
"As their families fragment, soon their homes will offer no escape from the pressures of work!"
"Over-stimulate their minds so that they cannot hear that small, still voice."
"Entice them to play the radio or cassestte player whenever they drive."?
"To keep the TV, VCR, CD's and their PC's going constantly in their home and see to it that every store and restaurant in the world plays non-biblical music constantly."
"This will jam their minds and break that union with Christ."
"Fill the coffee tables with magazines and newspapers."
"Pound their minds with the news 24 hours a day"
"Invade their driving moments with billboards."
"Flood their mailboxes?with junk mail, mail order catalogues, sweepstakes,?and every kind of newsletter and promotional?offering free products, services and false hopes.."
"keep skinny, beautiful models on the magazines and TV so their husbands will believe that outward beauty is what's important, and they'll become dissatisfied with?their wives."
"Keep the wives too tired to love their husbands at night."
Give them headaches too!
"If they don't give their husbands the love they need, they will begin to look eleswhere."
"That will fragment their families quickly!"
"Give them santa clause to distract them from teaching their children the real meaning of Christmas."
"Give them an Easter bunny so they won't talk about his resurrection and power over sin and death."
"Even in their recreation, let them be excessive."
"Have them return from their recreation exhausted."
"Keep them too busy to go out in nature and reflect on God's creation.? Send them to amusement parks, sporting events, plays, concerts, and movies instead.? Keep them busy, busy, busy!"
"And when they meet for spiritual fellowship, involve them in gossip and small talk so that they leave with troubled consciences."
"Crowd their lives with so many good causes?they have no time to seek power from Jesus"
"Soon they will be working in theirv own strength, sacrificing their health, and family for the good of the cause."
"It will work!" It will work!"
It was quite a plan!
The demons went eagerly to?their assignments?causing Christians everywhere to get busier and busier and more rushed, going here and there.
Having little time for their God or their families.
Having no time to tell others about the power of Jesus to change lives.? I guess the question is, has the devil been successful in his schemes?
You be the judge....
Does "BUSY" mean:
B-eing U-nder S-atan's Y-oke ?

Burned harvest

2005-11-20T10:36:00.000-08:00

We are as farmers taking time to create the perfect harvest. We lay out the soil in tidy fashion and gather fertilizer to help contain flourishment within the garden. (excrement from the living)
Each seed that is about to be added is counted and corrected from imperfections. The soil is walked upon by a caring farmer as he spreads the seed in an orderly fashion. The farmer makes sure that he is putting each seed in the best possible place for that seed to be. After the seed has been spread the farmer sits back as rain starts to fall from the heavens. The plants start to raise up from the earth as they bask in the glory of the rain. The harvest thrives upon it. The rain continues to fall until the plants are flourishing full of life. Basking in the presence of the rain. The plants are content with where they are. Violent winds start to blow. The harvest cries out in terror because they have no idea what to do. They have only been taught to grow and bask and not to defend themselves. They are helpless. The wind turns into lightning. Violently it srtikes all over the field. The farmer cries out "stop! stop! My harvest!" It's too late. The lightning strikes again lighting fire to the harvest. "Stop", cries the farmer. The fire spreads like wild fire, igniting everything in it's path. The farmer is helpless. He watches in disbelief as the field literally explodes into flame and ash. The harvest is gone. Reduced to hot ash in a matter of seconds. The farmer rolls around on the ground holding his head crying out. He stands up and cries out to the heavens. "What, what happened. What did I do wrong!?"

How many times in life do we feel like our harvest is being burned up before we can do anything about it?

unwanted birthday

2005-11-18T21:10:00.000-08:00

So, its finally November. A Month that has been dreaded by me since, well, as long as I can remember. The reason for this is: Its my Birthday on the 27th of November. I know that it is a time to be happy and spend time with your family an celebrate a new year of your existence. As well as getting closer to the drinking age requirement. The reason I don't like my Birthday is because it means that I am getting older. Again, something to be happy about. Not for me because I am worried about growing up. It makes me nervous to think about my future. It scars me to think about where I could be I a few years. I have a hard time trusting God in that area of my life. I know that he has a plan for me but still. I cant help worrying. No, No, I can help worrying. Worry go in the name of Jesus! I need to learn to celebrate my existence.

father God I put my life in your hands. I trust you.

If you are wondering about these pictures, they were taken this thanksgiving at my uncles house during a recent discovery of ours: (the Serez family) were crazy. If you hold a leaf blower up to your mouth; it makes your mouth puff up like a fish. (nonphotoshoped)

It was a fun time.

the human eye

2005-11-18T10:03:00.000-08:00

The human eye is the organ which gives us the sense of sight, allowing us to learn more about the surrounding world than we do with any of the other four senses. We use our eyes in almost every activity we perform, whether reading, working, watching television, writing a letter, driving a car, and in countless other ways. Most people probably would agree that sight is the sense they value more than all the rest.
The eye allows us to see and interpret the shapes, colors, and dimensions of objects in the world by processing the light they reflect or emit. The eye is able to see in bright light or in dim light, but it cannot see objects when light is absent.
Among the most important components of the human eye are the cornea, conjunctivaa, iris, crystalline lens, vitreous humor, retina, macula, optic nerve, and extraocular muscles.

Just thought i would share with you what has been fastinting me lately.

Brebuef

2005-11-17T10:23:00.000-08:00

This is a picture of Jean Brebeuf. Jean Brebeuf was the first Christian martyr in Canada. He was told by God to go to Canada to be a missionary to the Huron. During his service to the Huron, he was captured by another tribe of Indians know for their Brutal torture methods. The other Indians began to torture Jean as he kept his eyes fixed on God. He did not flinch. The tied him to a stake and started to brand him with hot pieces of metal. Still he did not flinch. Next. they started to pull off and remove all of his toe nails and fingernails, still he did not flinch, he kept his eyes fixed on God. The then started to tear strips of skin off his body. He did not flinch. The Indians then lit a fire under his feet. The fact that Jean wasn't flinching was bothersome to the Indians so, they began to cut off the soles of Jean's feet exposing bear flesh and muscle over flame. They then started to cut open his chest in order to get at his heart because they thought by devouring it they would aquire some of his strength. jeans strength did not come from his heart it came from the strength of God. After four hours of torture Jean brebuef died after his heart was devoured by the Indians. Throughout this entire session Jean did not flinch because he kept his eyes on God. God gave him strength to endure this torture.

So, my question is. Are we as Christians willing to die for what we believe in. Are we willing to die for Christ?

How far will we go?

break out

2005-11-16T13:01:00.000-08:00

Sometimes i feel like i am being put inside a box, or being pushed out of something. You know?, Im so sick of people trying to put limits on me. I was not meant to be confined! "Trapped inside a box with only a flicker of light shineing in from a crack in the box, Screaming my head off as people strain to hear. I get up enough energy to just stand up, Break out of the very box that held me in. (why?)

This is a lie that i have been forced to believe, but no more! I now know the truth. and that sets me apart. Because i have a life that is grounded in Christ.

...and im loving it!

dry bones

2005-11-16T09:05:00.000-08:00

Ezekiel 37
The Valley of Dry Bones 1 The hand of the LORD was upon me, and he brought me out by the Spirit of the LORD and set me in the middle of a valley; it was full of bones. 2 He led me back and forth among them, and I saw a great many bones on the floor of the valley, bones that were very dry. 3 He asked me, "Son of man, can these bones live?" I said, "O Sovereign LORD, you alone know."
4 Then he said to me, "Prophesy to these bones and say to them, 'Dry bones, hear the word of the LORD! 5 This is what the Sovereign LORD says to these bones: I will make breath and enter you, and you will come to life. 6 I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to life. Then you will know that I am the LORD.' "
7 So I prophesied as I was commanded. And as I was prophesying, there was a noise, a rattling sound, and the bones came together, bone to bone. 8 I looked, and tendons and flesh appeared on them and skin covered them, but there was no breath in them.
9 Then he said to me, "Prophesy to the breath; prophesy, son of man, and say to it, 'This is what the Sovereign LORD says: Come from the four winds, O breath, and breathe into these slain, that they may live.' " 10 So I prophesied as he commanded me, and breath entered them; they came to life and stood up on their feet a vast army.
11 Then he said to me: "Son of man, these bones are the whole house of Israel. They say, 'Our bones are dried up and our hope is gone; we are cut off.' 12 Therefore prophesy and say to them: 'This is what the Sovereign LORD says: O my people, I am going to open your graves and bring you up from them; I will bring you back to the land of Israel. 13 Then you, my people, will know that I am the LORD, when I open your graves and bring you up from them. 14 I will put my Spirit in you and you will live, and I will settle you in your own land. Then you will know that I the LORD have spoken, and I have done it, declares the LORD.' "

"Life as we know it"

2005-11-15T10:17:00.000-08:00

Life as we know it is only what we are used to. WE only know about things that we do in our everyday lives. If were to take a moment and realize what life is i think that it would chang our oppinions on certain things. We as humans must stop and realize what our purpose is for being alive. aslso, we must realize what freedom is. Because many times we take advantage of our freedom. God put us on this earth for a reason, why arent we taking time to understand and pursue that reason?

"When freedom is without knowledge of purpose it turns against society and humanity".

-Bren.